Wordpress back-up for the tumblr blog. This is just an archive: the fanart and fanfic posted on this blog are the properties of the users listed and linked in the individual posts.
for gavinnersroadie: “Something with the older Phi that adopts herself”!! there’s smth so incredibly bittersweet about raising a younger version of yourself. happy holidays ^o^ – niaori
I didn’t even consider this relationship a possibility when I began this project, but after writing this it has grown near and dear to my heart. I’d like to thank dispenserbox for expanding my horizons and ushering me into sigpei hell. I hope you enjoyed this. I worked hard to make it plausible canonically just for you.
The “theme song” of this fic, or rather the song I listened to the most while writing this, is Too Much Is Never Enough by Florence + The Machine. Thank you again, dispenserbox. I might well have enjoyed writing this more than you’ll enjoy reading it.
Junpei did a double take at the pastel pink flyer with the tear-off phone numbers. No price was listed, and yet not a single phone number had been taken. Who could pass up free tutoring, especially considering the financial distress students endured in college? It was as if it were destiny.
He evaluated his own cuteness factor. Was he even cute? No, of course not. Cool, handsome men like Tenmyouji Junpei were above the title of cute. But what if this flyer was looking for girls? Could Junpei dress up as a girl? It didn’t matter. Junpei was desperate. He couldn’t fail this class, no matter the cost. As long as it didn’t cost as much as it did to retake this class. Begrudgingly, he ripped off a slip of paper and dialed the number.
“Hey, I need a tutor. How much are you asking?”
Junpei shakily grasped the phone. What if he had to give himself up in order to be tutored? The thought of being in a bed with someone else scared him to death.
“What’s your name, beautiful caller?”
It was a male voice. Junpei was simultaneously relieved and worried. He wouldn’t have to do the unspeakable now, but what if that ruined his chances of being tutored? He decided now was a good time to grovel.
“Junpei. I’m… not a girl. I can dress up like a girl though! Not that I like to. Unless you want me to… Listen, I just really need help with math. I’ll do anything.”
A half chuckle, half sigh could be heard on the other side of the line. What was so amusing about Junpei’s despair?
“Hey, I don’t care about what’s in your pants. I’m not going to see you naked, that’s what porn is for! I just need to make sure you have a nice face so tutoring doesn’t get too boring. I’ll tell you what, meet me by that dead tree on campus in… let’s say a half hour? Then we’ll talk numbers.”
Numbers. Numbers as in money? Money wasn’t supposed to be a factor here. Frenziedly, Junpei attempted to compose himself. “Are you there?! GODDAMMIT!”
He was met with the telltale dial tone. Junpei’s lip quivered as he struggled to come up with an appropriate pun to deescalate the situation.
“Excuse ME, phone. Don’t use that tone on me.”
That was good! He ought to write that one down. But first, it was time to head to the rendezvous point. Okay, maybe it was just a meeting place, but rendezvous sounded far cooler in his head.
Chapter 2: Pre-999
This had to be a prank.
This jackass was laying in the grass wearing a cat shirt that was about two sizes too small for his muscles, chewing gum with his mouth open while stroking what could only be described as anime boy hair. What kind of signals was he trying to send? Junpei sighed and decided the only appropriate response was a pun.
“Meow’s it going?”
Wrong answer. The tutor to be aggressively stood up with wide eyes and clenched fists, squawking out furiously endearing cat puns. “Mew told you about my tic? I’m not KITTEN AROUND!!!” As he screamed, he clenched Junpei’s small figure and shook him fiercely. He couldn’t fight back against the hunk of a man. All he had was his ability to yell back indignantly.
“Tic? What the hell?! Let go of me!”
Realizing all too late it was just an honest mistake, generic anime protagonist boy sat Junpei gently on the ground and tried to conceal his shame.
“Oh… I mean… you’re here for math, right? Hi. I’m Sigma. You must be Junpei, right?”
Junpei suppressed his boiling anger and gracelessly shook Sigma’s hand. Sigma the math tutor. That could NOT be his real name. Could it? Junpei felt less cool by the second around the peculiar cat man.
“Yup. That’s me. Here for math.”
Sigma flashed him a ultra-white smile and used his grip on Junpei’s hand to his advantage. Shifting his weight forwards, he forcibly shoved Junpei to the ground, rolled over, and laid next to him with his index finger to the sky.
“Say no more! Here’s your first quiz. Look at the clouds. What do you see? Gaze up at the sky with those beautiful brown eyes of yours.”
Junpei did not enjoy being man handled, but it appeared to be ‘Sigma’s’ favorite thing to do. The hell was he, anyway? Some kind of cyborg? There was no way any normal college student had time to get rock hard abs, tutor students, and still get passing grades.
“What does this have to do with-” He found a finger pressed against his lips. Junpei was eager to prove himself, but couldn’t find the appropriate word. Or… any words. “I see… uh… I don’t know.”
Sigma turned towards Junpei with an earnest expression. “Do you know what I always say when I don’t know what something is? I call it a funyarinpa.”
It sounded rather strange for an American man to say something so similar to his native language, yet gibberish all the same. He hoped he wasn’t being insulted.
“A funyarinpa?”
Grasping his hand, Sigma attempted to make eye contact, but Junpei squirmed under his gaze.
“You’d better believe it. And then when people ask what the hell it is, you act insulted. Turn the tables on them, and you get off scot free! It’s how I survived art appreciation.”
He seemed sincere enough about this bullshit. It was almost compelling. “I… like that.” Junpei found himself laughing. Maybe his guard was up for nothing. This man was just a harmless flirt.
“Feel free to use it! Now, let’s do the deed.”
Junpei proceeded to get up to prepare to run if the clearly not harmless man made any more advances at him. “The deed?!” Sigma tugged at Junpei to prevent him from running off before he got the chance to explain himself.
“Math, you idiot. I already told you I’m not looking to screw you. Why, are you interested?”
Junpei stared at him, wide eyed and clearly terrified. Sigma could tell that he was not comfortable with the topic of sexuality. Shame. He was very cute, just as the flyer he had put out required. The flyer… The poor guy was honestly just looking to be tutored, and Sigma was taking advantage of his desperation.
“Silence. I see. Okay, how about this. Tell me what area of math you have issues with.”
The straightforward business calmed him Junpei down slightly, but he was clearly still shaken by the ordeal. “Well… uh… I’m always typing every little thing into my calculator. Mental math is hard for me.”
Sigma gave him an understanding nod. It was time to put his brain to use. Except instead of using his intellect for pleasure, he would use it to help this boy. If pleasure came out of it, though, he certainly would not mind.
“I learned mental math by doing sudoku. It forces you to learn it in a way that’s not boring. Do you know how to play sudoku?”
Junpei was a bit astounded by the question. He was expecting the standard times table sheet drills. But then again, how could he expect normal from Sigma?
“I’ve heard of it. Don’t old people play sudoku?”
Once more, Sigma forced Junpei to sit on the grass and grinned at him. “What makes you think I’m not an old man in a young body? Now, come here. Let me show you how.”
Chapter 3: Pre-999
Sudoku soon became second nature to Junpei, and Sigma became a part of him. The more time he spent with Sigma, the more progress he made. He quickly moved on to digital roots and other math ventures. Once he got past the dizzying numbers, it was almost kind of fun thanks to his talented teacher.
Of course, at first it was pure business. Sigma had a very ‘hands on’ approach to teaching, so all of the touching was acceptable, normal. Comfortable. Regrettably, one could only do so much sudoku without losing focus. Every lesson descended in to vivacious conversations rich with banter, puns, and the not so occasional flirting. They found themselves baking cookies when they were supposed to be doing math. When things got too close for comfort, Junpei simply brought up cats and everything was fine. Normal. Safe. Their relationship was at a standstill.
“Hey Jump. Do you think we can hang out?”
Junpei scratched his neck and examined the asphalt, leaning against Sigma’s car. What kind of a question was that? They were past the point of asking. They hung out every day at this point. Sigma examined his nervous stature, concerned, and decided to elaborate.
“Not in a math way. In a… hanging out way?”
Elaboration only made the air thicker as Junpei stuttered out fragments of sentences. “You’re not… of course you’re not. That would be insane. You wouldn’t.”
Both men had equally red faces. Sigma frantically attempted to cut the tension, nervously rambling, “Yeah. Yeah. Of course not! That shit’s wack. Hella wack. I’m not asking you on a… But like, do you want to go out to dinner tonight?”
With clenched fists, Junpei quickly and excitedly replied, “I’d love to! I mean sure. I mean you’re fine. That’s fine. This is great!” Awkward laughter became genuine as Sigma put Junpei over his shoulder.
“You’re cute when you’re flustered. Alright, hop in.” Junpei did not even attempt to fight against being manhandled by Sigma. At this point, he was so used to being carried around he just let Sigma strap him in the passenger seat and drive off. The driver cranked up his radio and sassily lip synced to his Latin EDM. Junpei didn’t pretend to understand a word of the music, but it was too infectious to resist, so he soon joined in the commotion. Before they knew it, they had arrived. Junpei insisted they remain for the rest of the song, and then Sigma ignored him and carried Junpei inside the barren restaurant.
“Oh yeah, I forgot! Place got shut down. Health violation or whatever. Don’t sweat it, I brought our own food. I’m a damn good cook, you know.”
Junpei had seen Sigma cook before. He had one of those frilly pink kiss the cook aprons. It was kind of adorable. Adorable wasn’t important right now, though. They were in the middle of a danger zone! Junpei opened his mouth to protest their presence in hazard town before he found a familiar finger pressed against his lips. “Jump, it’ll be ok. The food was the issue, and we brought our own. Now where do you wanna sit? We have the entire place to ourselves.”
Spinning around, Junpei surveyed the room. All of the windows were boarded up, with little streaks of sunshine peeking in through the cracks. It was almost majestic. “So… everything we do in here is secret, huh?”
Sigma placed his heavy hand on his shoulder and grinned in the dim light. “Yep. No cameras or anything. What happens here stays here. Why, do you have something in mind?”
Junpei glanced at Sigma’s lips for a moment. Sigma was out of his league and far more sexually driven than he cared for. He didn’t have any issues with liking a boy, but being in bed with one was an entirely different thing. Evidently, there were no beds here. Sigma was respectful enough to know the meaning of consent. It would be fine. Everything was fine. Staring, staring, staring at his lips Junpei shook for fear of possibility.
“I’m about to take a gamble. But gambling is math, and I’m pretty good at it.”
Before he had the chance to run, reeling at the sheer prospect of… of whatever he wanted to happen, Sigma crashed into him. The taste of cherry chapstick in his mouth left Junpei shaky and craving more. He had sucked the words out of Junpei’s mouth with his soft lips and hot breath.
“Thanks. That was… thanks. I mean… You’re an ass,” Junpei muttered as Sigma covered his neck and face in kisses. “Don’t I get a turn?” He looked up at smug Sigma longingly, trying to climb him to get on his level.
“Do you honestly think you can kiss better than-” Junpei shoved his tongue in his mouth as he spoke. Sigma grabbed him and pulled him closer, pushing him against the wall while his feet dangled above the ground.
Eating was the last priority during their little picnic. Junpei simply let himself be held, and kissed, and lavished upon, until the sun set. Sigma drove him home with promises of further meetings and love dripping from his lips as he kissed him goodbye for the night.
The next morning, Junpei was gone.
Chapter 4: Post-999
He could have returned to college. He could have returned to Sigma.
But he couldn’t have. Not after what he’d seen. Not after what he’d known. He had tasted death, betrayal, thousands of worlds at his fingertips. He had shared this with Akane and Akane alone. This was not for the lighthearted. The burden of truth and death laid of Junpei, and he daren’t weigh Sigma down with the sickening knowledge of morphogenetic fields.
Without Sigma, he knew for a fact he would not have been able to seek a way out. Akane was his goal now, though. Sigma could never know him the way Akane did, and as much as he liked, maybe even loved him… he belonged to Akane now. Junpei would destroy himself to find her.
Maybe in another timeline… maybe he would have had a chance. There was no use dwelling on it, though. The past crumbled under future’s iron fist, and the daydreams were gone.
Chapter 5: Pre-ZTD
It was time to find Akane. After fighting for a year, he had tracked her down. Everything was set for him to marry her. Yet when he walked into Dcom, the first thing that caught his eye was a previous love.
“S-sigma? What are you-“
When Sigma turned around, he looked right through him. His gaze was distant and tired, his stance frantic as he grabbed Junpei’s arm brashly, frightened words falling out of his mouth. “Junpei. Why are you here? Do you have a death wish?!”
Junpei tugged his arm away impudently, and scowled at the man he had once cared for. Why did Sigma think he was entitled to touching his body? Just because they shared a few stolen kisses? Regardless of how nice he looked, it was still rude and uncalled for. “I’m just here on business. What’s it to you?”
“You’re going to die if you’re here, Junpei.”
He rolled his eyes. As if he hadn’t died plenty of times already. What was one more death to him when he had a shot at obtaining Akane? “Tch. I’ve heard that one before.”
Sigma grabbed him by the shoulders and yelled, “No! Please, listen to me. The world is going to-”
Suddenly, Sigma’s eyes came into focus as he spotted something behind Junpei. Whipping around, Junpei found the object of his attention. A plain looking redhead. Sigma started muttering incoherently to himself, and quickly ran off, slamming a door behind him.
That was the nature of it, wasn’t it? Fate was forcing them apart. Each of them half pursued, half feared the women that controlled their fates, but until death or another timeline stepped in, they were stuck.
Besides, Sigma seemed like a different person. Older, full of fear and wisdom he had never possessed when Junpei knew him in college. It appeared this year had changed them both.
Chapter 6: Post-ZTD
Everything was foggy. He had went to Dcom, Junpei was sure of that. But… had he seen Akane? He had heard everyone there died. Did that mean Akane…?
Radical 6. It had ravaged the world. Junpei had been interrogated, since he was registered for the experiment, but he couldn’t remember anything. He had this deep urge to pursue Akane, but he found himself unable to carry on with his detective work after the outbreak. The middle aged man settled down in a decently sized hovel, with enough alcohol to numb the pain, and took up being a trash picker. The phone usually rang a few times a week, with someone on the other line begging him for certain materials. Junpei always replied with a numbing heart that he could only work for money. He expected this call to be the same.
“…Junpei. I mean… Jump…”
It was him. Junpei nearly dropped the phone. Someone he loved was alive! The last time he saw him was before the nonary game. He didn’t expect… how? Tears quickly welled up in his eyes as his heart pounded in his chest.
“You’re alive? I checked the survivors list and you were nowhere on there. Nobody I know survived. How did you-“
“I went to live on the moon with my wife, Diana.”
A wife. Of course Sigma had moved on. Junpei had moved on too. So why was he so hurt? Why did the tears that had sprung up in joy now feel bitter and lost? Wiping his face on his shirt, Junpei took a deep breath and continued the conversation.
“You have a wife? I’d love to meet her. I’ve got plenty of beer… I wouldn’t mind hanging out.”
Hanging out. Sigma had asked him on their first and only date like that, but he probably didn’t even remember now that he was married.
“She’s dead. She just died yesterday.”
Junpei had to suppress a smile. Both of their ‘soul mates’ were dead? Was this a coincidence?
“Sigma…. I’m… we’ve all lost important people to us. Do you want to talk or…”
For a good 15 seconds, there was silence on both lines as they waited for one of them to make some sort of move.
“I’m tired of all of this, Junpei. I’m tired of all of the universes conspiring against us, tired of my destiny being thrust upon me, tired of making sacrifices to save a world that doesn’t love me back. I-”
Coincidences didn’t exist. This was their timeline. This had to be. How else could he have known about it? Unless this was one of those nightmares disguised as a dream that left him crying and screaming and drowning when he woke.
“Universes? You know about morphogenetic fields?”
A low groan could be heard on the other side of the line.
“Does it even matter? Can’t we just go back before any of it mattered? Our college days… You were afraid of even kissing me back then, but I’m sure that’s changed.”
Junpei found himself blushing for the first time in many years.
“S-Sigma, are you asking-“
“Yes. Please let me move in with you. We don’t have to do anything if you-“
“No. No, it’s fine. You can move in with me. I wouldn’t…. I haven’t shared a bed with someone since before Radical Six. It would be nice to have some company.”
Chapter 7: Post-ZTD
Every night for a year, they shared a bed. He didn’t question how Sigma lost his eye, or how he seemingly knew everything about Junpei. It was a contented ignorance, full of somber lovemaking and solemn puns. Junpei wanted to know everything about Sigma, but whenever he brought it up Sigma quickly shut him up with a passionate kiss.
Then there were the nights where the air was more breathable, and the diseased world didn’t seem so scary. Those nights, Sigma would hold Junpei’s hand and gaze up at the moon as he regaled him with stories about the more controversial side of quantum physics.
“I built this eye myself, you know. After… a friend provided me the arms.”
Junpei grabbed his arms and held them up to the dim light, aghast. “Your arms are fake?” Tugging his arms away, Sigma sniggered and casually slid his hand down Junpei’s back.
“You didn’t even notice, did you? I’ve touched you everywhere and you had no idea,” Sigma whispered in his ear seductively.
Normally Junpei would have indulged in these sorts of pleasantries. It did explain why Sigma’s fingers were so nimble. In spite of this, he knew they had to talk. “You’re leaving, aren’t you, Sigma? I know you have to soon.”
Sigma did not hesitate in kissing him in an attempt to shut him up like usual. “What makes you say that, Jump? Don’t be so somber.” Crossing his arms, Junpei frowned while Sigma reached under his shirt.
“You’ve been talking to me lately. Telling me intimate details about your life. You never used to do that. The only reason I can think of is that you’re going to disappear.” Without warning, Sigma’s hands dropped to his sides, and a look of realization came upon his face. He couldn’t keep Junpei in the dark forever, no matter how badly he wanted to.
“Junpei… I… I have to go save the world. You understand, right?”
Taking a moment to process everything, Junpei glanced at his boyfriend with a look of betrayal. Tears quickly turned to hysteria as he began to rave. “Save the world?! This world is past saving, Sigma! Can’t we just let it be? Like you said, go back before any of it mattered. I can’t lose you. I can’t be alone again. Not after she died…”
It was time for the lies to end.
“Akane Kurashiki… is alive.”
With that, Sigma walked out the door for the last time and disappeared into the night.
Chapter 8: VLR
He would have pursued her if he hadn’t found the child outside. Quark became the new focus of Junpei’s life, and his love for Akane and Sigma became more of a fact of life than a constant thought. Except for the fact that as soon as he was contacted by Akane, he dropped everything and decided to endanger Quark and violate everything he stood for on the off chance of seeing her again.
What he didn’t expect to see was Sigma. As soon as he jumped out of the elevator shaft, he glimpsed at him, concerned. Something about Sigma seemed… off. In the end, Junpei decided to ask about the most important things first. They were in a bit of a hostage situation, after all.
“They grabbed you too, huh?” Junpei tried to make eye contact, but Sigma seemed too busy drooling over all of the women surrounding him. He especially seemed to have a penchant for the redhead.
“…Grabbed?… Oh… yeah… I got in my car… I went to start the engine and there was this white smoke….” When he stammered out his narrative, he seemed to be speaking in the same tone of voice he had in college, not the pronounced, regal, and to the point manner he did last time he saw him. Maybe he was just disoriented.
“So… you’d be Tenmyouji then, right, sir?” Sigma truly didn’t remember. What had happened to him when he tried to ‘save the world’?
“Yup.” Tenmyouji was just another player to Sigma. It was time to accept that.
Chapter q: VLR
“She’s just a girl…” Sigma muttered to himself, examining the picture of Akane. “Is she your granddaughter?”
Junpei looked up at Sigma with a pained expression in his eyes. “No.”
Holding the photo up to the light, Sigma tried to recall where he’d seen it before. “Well who is she, then?”
Heartbroken and furious, Junpei decided to grace him with an answer. “Urgh… dammit, fine. You’ve already seen her, after all. Her name is Akane Kurashiki. I’ve been looking for her for… for a long time.”
Akane Kurashiki. He remembered. Swallowing his excitement, Sigma pressed on. “Why?”
The child piped up, eager to reply. “Because she’s his first love.”
They were watching the clouds one day when ever smiling Junpei took out a picture.
“Who’s that?” Sigma struggled to see it against the sun’s glare.
Without hesitation, Junpei handed it over. “Ah, she was my childhood best friend. Her name is Akane Kurashiki.”
Studying Junpei’s contented expression, Sigma tried to make light of the situation. “Ooooh, did you LIKE her?”
Junpei shrugged. “In a childhood crush sort of way, maybe. But we weren’t in love. We never even kissed. There has to at least be a kiss for it to be a first love, right?”
Clutching his hand, Sigma was slightly relieved. “Jump, I’m not sure if that’s how it works.”
“N-NO! You’ve got it wrong!”
As the child continued to blather on, Sigma looked up at who he now recognized as Junpei knowingly. She wasn’t his first love. He was. “Huh. Didn’t mark you for a hopeless romantic, Tenmyouji.”
Junpei seemed incredibly nervous. Was he worried he’d find out who was hiding under that shriveled up man? “Look, it’s not about love, and I’m not a goddamn romantic!”
Smirking at his newfound discovery, Sigma advanced towards Junpei. “Okay, okay. You don’t wanna talk about her, I get it.”
Sigma grabbed Junpei and turned the wall so only the two of them were in the tight space. “You wanna talk about me, is that it? How did this… how are you old? How is any of this happening?”
Junpei responded by pushing Sigma into the chair and climbing onto his lap. “…Someone once asked me if we could go back before any of it mattered.”
Placing his hands on Junpei’s waist, Sigma nodded. “We can do that.”
None of this mattered. All that mattered was that they made their love known before it was torn away again. They both journeyed back before any of it mattered… before death and life, the end and the beginning. They were one, and everything was perfect for one moment.
I’ve cooked up a little bit of Carlos/Junpei for you this Christmas. Even though it’s probably a bit more platonic and a hell of a lot less fluffy than you were were imagining, I hope you enjoy it. I decided to spice it up with the spirit of your first prompt as well, by setting it between games: of course, there’s only one pair of games that Carlos/Junpei can be between. Finally, since it fits, I decided to throw in a little head-canon that I think really binds the whole thing together. I hope you appreciate it, and have a Merry Christmas.
“I need you to forget, Junpei.”
Junpei fell to the cold steel floor of the elevator that had carried them out of the bunker, clawing at his thigh and the needles of the bracelet that had been forced into it. For just a moment he reached out his arm towards Akane – the woman whose bracelet it was and who had used it against him – before even that fell still.
Akane took a deep, sorrowful breath. “I do what I must to accomplish my goals. That is just how I am,” she announced. Her right hand shook slightly, and the ring on her finger with it.
Carlos stumbled back, his hands raised warily. “Whoa, Akane… Hold on! What are you doing?”
“Don’t worry, Carlos,” Akane said, “You get to keep your memories. I still need someone to look after Junpei when he wakes up.”
“Look… after him?” Carlos asked.
“He won’t remember anything about the Decision Game,” Akane explained, “He won’t remember much from D-Com, either. And he won’t remember Radical-6. You heard what we told you. That virus will spread across the entire world, killing everyone it touches. Junpei… Junpei has to survive.” The ring on Akane’s finger twitched again. “You need to help him, Carlos. You need to make sure he lives.”
“Wait! I…” Carlos started to say.
Akane scribbled something on a scrap of paper and tossed it to Carlos. A quick glance showed it to be a set of GPS coordinates. “There’s a shelter, south and east of here,” Akane said, “I had it prepared beforehand, just in case. It’s got everything Junpei and you will need to get through this. It’s all yours.”
“No!” Carlos shouted. His fist clenched. “I can’t do this. I have to get back to New York. I have to make sure that Maria’s okay!”
Akane turned her face away. “I thought you might say that, Carlos. I understand why you’d want to look after your sister. But I think… I think that if you really wanted to ensure that Maria’s okay… you’d go with Junpei. And you wouldn’t tell him that I was ever here.”
Carlos shivered. The meaning of Akane’s words sunk into him. “Akane… You wouldn’t… I thought I knew you!”
“I do what I must to accomplish my goals.” Akane turned away and started walking into the desert. Still, her voice carried back to Carlos, cutting across the gently blowing wind, and the last thing she said was, “Don’t worry. It’s not forever. Eventually, the worst possible thing will happen. After that, you’re free to do what you want.”
Akane disappeared into the dunes. Carlos sunk to his knees.
Junpei was awoken by the sound of a blaring siren. From the vibrations of the seat he was sitting in, he realised he was in a vehicle moving at speed. Snuggled in his lap was an elderly but vibrantly healthy terrier; his collar called him, ‘Gab’.
“Junpei, you’re awake!” came a voice from Junpei’s left.
Junpei looked over at the driver. He was an angular-jawed blond-haired man, wearing a fireman’s suit. That made sense: they were in a fire-truck. Nothing else did: Junpei was sure he was supposed to be heading for the Mars Mission test site to find Akane. That shouldn’t have involved ending up in a fire-engine.
Then, an idea popped into Junpei’s mind. “You’re one of the Mars Mission participants, aren’t you?”
The man nodded. “That’s right. Well, I was one.” He paused. “You don’t remember much else about me, right? I’m Carlos. I guess that, for you, this is the first time that you’ve met me.”
Junpei listened as the man – Carlos – described how the Mars Mission experiment had been hijacked by some terrorist group, who had used it to release a dangerous virus called Radical-6 into the world. According to Carlos, there was now no way to stop it spreading. “It was Free the Soul who did this, wasn’t it? Of course it was. I knew something like this was going to happen,” Junpei stated.
“You’ve heard of them?” Carlos asked, “I didn’t know they existed until today.”
Junpei nodded. Then, he asked the question that was weighing on his shoulders. “I joined the Mars Mission experiment hoping to meet someone. Someone I haven’t seen for a long time. Did you see her? Akane Kurashiki?”
Carlos didn’t answer at first. He looked at the road; he changed gears. Finally, he shook his head. “She wasn’t there.”
Junpei sat in silence for a few minutes. Then, he asked, “Where are we going?”
“We need somewhere to weather out the Radical-6 outbreak,” Carlos said. He paused for a couple of seconds. “Someone… someone told me about a shelter. That’s where we are going.”
The rest of the journey passed in silence, save for the screaming of the siren that sped the fire-engine along. Eventually, they arrived at the shelter that Carlos was talking about. It lay within sight of the Colorado River, just off a harbour where several small boats were tied to a pier. Pieces of corrugated metal and rough-cut lumber were piled around the central structure: a small steel mound poking out from the structure concealed beneath the surface. Only a bulky hatch allowed access.
“We should go in and have a look around,” Carlos said.
The hatch opened, though only with considerable effort from both Junpei and Carlos, and they began to explore the inside. The shelter went deep below the ground, intended to house several hundreds of people rather than just two. Alongside the many floors of bedrooms and living spaces, there were also other facilities: a walk-in freezer filled with canned foods, a large bay of hydroponics tanks, an engineering workshop equipped with power tools and 3-D printers and, near the bottom of the shelter, the nuclear reactor that powered the whole thing.
But most ominous of all was the medical centre, since Junpei and Carlos found there kits which could test for Radical-6 infection.
“They knew this was coming,” Carlos muttered, “and they were planning for the long term.”
Junpei turned towards him. “Who told you about this place?” he asked sternly.
Carlos looked away. “It was… one of the other Mars Mission participants,” he replied.
“Then why aren’t they here with us?!”
“I don’t know. I don’t know what they were thinking.” Carlos fell silent for about a minute. Then, he said, “Let’s head somewhere else. There has to be something here to take our minds off this.”
Junpei and Carlos headed back up the underground shelter, finding a common room tucked among the residential area. It had a bar, reasonably well stocked with spirits. It also had a television. Carlos turned it on, and as it blared to life the news started to play.
“Valley Hospital, Las Vegas, was thrown into chaos when fifty doctors, nurses and medical technicians threw themselves from the roof. Witnesses described the mass suicide as ‘grisly’, ‘catastrophic’ and ‘unimaginable’. We turn to our reporter on the scene for more information.”
“We’re here on Pinto Lane, Las Vegas, just outside the cordon the police have set up. People here are… just completely shocked. They haven’t seen anything like this before; I can certainly say I haven’t. Even from this distance, we can see some of the results of this horrifying event, as the coroners try to identify and respectfully remove the bodies. I’ve been talking to some of the grieving families as they’ve come to identify their loved ones. Almost universally, the victims were described as happy and contents, with much to live for. No-one knows what drove these poor people to such a final decision, and I don’t think anyone ever will be able to understand. Still, hearing about these bright young people choosing to end it all, you have to wonder if they knew something we didn’t.”
Junpei slammed the television off. He was shaking. He shook even as he fell into the armchair that Carlos had moved up behind him. “It’s really happening,” Junpei whispered.
Carlos knelt down next to Junpei and held his hand, squeezing it until Junpei’s shaking stopped. “I’m sorry, Junpei.”
“I was sure you were lying,” Junpei said, “I was waiting until I felt better to get the drop on you and run away, but… the world really is ending. We really are just stuck here.”
“I didn’t believe it myself when you… when I first found out,” Carlos answered.
Junpei sat there silently for several minutes. He felt as though he would never come to terms with what had happened. But eventually, even that feeling passed. He sighed. “Well, since we’re stuck together: nice to meet you, Carlos. I guess I could enjoy coming to get to know you.”
Carlos and Junpei talked into the late hours of the night, though the uniform harsh lights of the shelter obscured the actual time. Junpei told Carlos about Akane, and how he’d spent an entire year trying to find her again. Carlos told Junpei about his sister, Maria, and the efforts he had taken to earn the money needed to cure her Reverie Syndrome.
Eventually, their tiredness overcame even their despair. Junpei and Carlos found a place for Gab to sleep, and then choose adjacent bedrooms for themselves and went to sleep as well.
Junpei had a nightmare that night. In it, he saw Akane. He watched, paralysed, as she appeared to stab a dagger into her own chest. But then the dream shifted, and the heart that the dagger had been driven into was Junpei’s own.
As Radical-6 spread across the world, rumours spread as well: rumours of a place untouched by the fires that had ravaged everything else. And so people started to approach the shelter that Carlos and Junpei had made their home.
Carlos was ready for them, as much as he could be. He’d extracted the radio from his fire-truck so that they could use it to communicate with the incoming people and the rest of the outside world. He’d also jury-rigged his turn-out gear so that they would hopefully protect from Radical-6 as well as heat and smoke. Wearing them, Junpei and he could intercept the refugees, and hand them the Radial-6 testing kits. About two thirds of the people who found the shelter were clean and welcomed inside.
But the people Carlos had gone out to meet that day were not.
Being rejected from the shelter was usually the last straw for those who were infected with Radical-6. Carlos had seen it before: people succumbing to suicide only shortly after turning away. This group was worse though, and not only because they had done it right in front of him. The woman Carlos had rejected had shot her two infant children before turning the gun on herself. Even that wasn’t the end, though. The bodies were still out there, and still infected. They were still there as a danger to other people trying to find the shelter. Carlos needed to decontaminate them before his job was done.
As Carlos dropped the match onto the pyre, he crossed himself. “I’m supposed to be saving people from fires,” he muttered as a bitter prayer, “not burning them myself.”
Junpei also wearing the modified protective gear, came up behind Carlos and grasped him firmly by the shoulder. “I can finish it off. Go back inside.”
Carlos shrugged him off. “No. I need to see this through. I wouldn’t forgive myself if I didn’t.” He looked down at the charring bodies once more. “It’s just…”
Junpei grabbed Carlos again and spun him around with surprising force. “Listen, Carlos! We are saving people. There’s about a hundred people back there who wouldn’t be alive without us. And if we let a single infected person through, all of them die. All of them. We have to do this!”
Carlos just stood there, glumly silent. Junpei studied his face intently, before continuing to speak.
“You’re feeling guilty about something else, aren’t you? Something other than the people we have to turn away. I could be deaf and blind and still realise that.”
Carlos clenched his fist and ground his teeth. He couldn’t let Junpei know about the other thing that was worrying him. It was the lie that had brought them to the shelter, and the whole thing would fall apart if it ever got out.
“It’s about Maria, right?” Junpei asked.
Carlos could at least talk about that. “Yeah. Yes, that’s right.” He fell silent again.
Junpei nodded. “I always wondered why you’d stayed here rather than go look for her. How come?”
Carlos sighed, buying time for another white lie. “It was too far. I didn’t know how far the virus had spread when I picked you up. If I’d caught it on the way there, if I infected her with it…”
“Okay, okay!” Junpei shushed him, “There’s no need to get completely morbid. Let’s get back inside, before you get any worse.” He looked over at the flames sprouting above the pyre. “That’s done, anyway. There’s no way any Radical-6 survived that.”
Carlos nodded, and returned with Junpei to the hatch.
Carlos had a nightmare that night. In it, he saw both Maria and Junpei hanging from cliffs on opposite sides of a lake filled with poison, filled with Radical-6. In the dream his heart was filled with a dreadful certainty: he’d only be able to save one of them, and not the other.
On April 13th, Junpei was woken by a voice calling his name.
“Junpei! Junpei! You need to get up here!” The voice was Emily’s. She had been one of the first – first uninfected – people to arrive at the shelter after Junpei and Carlos, and she often ended up taking the leadership role when they weren’t able to. With the shelter housing eight hundred people and nearly full, there was no way Carlos and Junpei could do everything anymore.
“What is it?” Junpei called back groggily, “Can’t it wait until later?”
“The radio’s receiving a signal!” Emily explained, “It’s quite weak, so we took it to the surface to pick it up better.”
“Well then: listen to what it says and tell me later!” Junpei fell quickly back to sleep.
He was immediately woken up again. “We can’t! Whoever it is, they’re speaking Japanese!”
“Goddamnit, okay then! I’m coming!”
When Junpei was awake and dressed and Emily had dragged him up to the surface, he saw, through the dim light of the dawn that Carlos was already up there, sitting in the centre of a crowd of people with the radio. Gab was also out there, nuzzling the back of Carlos’ hand. No-one was wearing protective suits: they hadn’t seen anyone approach for a while, and they had set up a perimeter of electronic sensors to warn of anyone coming. As long as they weren’t close to anyone infected, there was no danger of Radical-6.
Carlos spotted Junpei’s arrival. “I’m glad to see you back among the living. What do you make of this?”
Junpei joined Carlos in the centre of the circle. He listened to the words coming through the radio, and began to translate for the others at the start of the next sentence.
“It has thus become clear that the factor that has continually frustrated our efforts to eradicate Radical-6 is the population of wild animals, which harbours the virus and reintroduces it after each quarantine attempt. It has also become clear that merely killing the wildlife on the edges of the remaining pockets of human civilisation is not enough. Thus, we have chosen to implement a more thorough solution that will eradicate Radical-6 for good.
“We here at the Hokkaido Antimatter Reactor, as well as our esteemed colleagues around the world, wish the rest of humanity the best of luck. We hope you think well of us once we are gone.” The radio played one more word that everyone understood – “Sayonara” – and then fell silent.
“Huh?” Emily piped up, “What did it mean, ‘a more thorough…’?”
Her voice cut off. Lights flashed into being among the twilight of the dawn: three to the north, one to the south, one just visible over the western horizon. They were mere pinpricks, but impossibly bright.
“Oh,” Junpei gasped softly, “Oh no.”
Carlos leapt to his feet. “Everyone!” he yelled, his voice an urgent command, “Everyone, get back in the shelter! Now! Go, go, go!”
People hesitated for a moment. They hadn’t understood as quickly as Junpei or Carlos had. But Carlos was trained for emergencies, and used to people’s vacillation during them. His sheer presence got people moving, until a confused and scared but somewhat-organised crowd was racing towards the shelter. Junpei joined them, scooping up Gab and the radio as he did so.
Despite having been at the back of the crowd to make sure everyone was coming, Carlos reached the hatch first. He wrenched it open single-handedly, but didn’t go down; instead, he stood astride the hole, helping others down. His movements settled into a powerful, mechanical rhythm: take a hand, hoist the person up, guide them to the ladder inside, back for the next person.
Junpei was last in the queue. “Take Gab and get down there,” he shouted as he held the terrified dog up, “I’ll follow you.”
Carlos just pulled Junpei up by the shoulder. “No. I promised to myself I’d put everyone else first, especially you. It’s the only way I’d…” Carlos trailed off as he dangled Junpei down the hole.
Junpei tried to stand on the ladder; with his arms full he failed. “I can’t do it!” he yelled up incoherently.
Carlos looked down. “Don’t worry, Junpei. I…” Carlos looked up. He gasped, sharply.
Junpei fell.
A couple of people caught him as he reached the bottom, but the shock of the landing still forced a jolt of pain through Junpei’s nerves. Gab yelped, diving away into Emily’s arms.
Junpei craned his neck up. “Carlos! What the hell?!”
There was a brief flash of light piercing through the gap around the rim of the closing hatch.
Carlos fell. He tumbled as his foot caught a rung of the ladder, spinning through the air until he hit the ground on his left hand side with a sickening crunch.
“Carlos!” Junpei scrambled over, ignoring the pain in his own body. “Goddamnit! What happened?! I thought you were following me in.”
“I followed you in pretty quickly, quickly as possible. Fell really quickly” Carlos mumbled, “Got the hatch closed on my way down.”
“Did you get down in time?!” Junpei roared, trying to keep Carlos awake, “Please tell me that didn’t hit you!”
Carlos still seemed delirious. “That’s what she said. ‘Eventually, the worst possible thing will happen.’ That’s when she said I should stop worrying. Stop worrying about Maria.” Carlos’ voice trailed off. His eyes closed.
Junpei stood up and turned back to face the waiting crowd. His voice trembled. “Get Carlos to the medbay. Someone! Please!” Junpei sighed with relief as Carlos was carried safely away. But even then, he wondered about what his friend had said in those final moments.
Junpei found out later that Carlos hadn’t escaped the blast in time: not quite. His right hand had erupted with a weeping red welt from where it had just been caught as it grabbed the rim of the hatch.
That night, and many others after, Junpei dreamed. They were the dreams of an Esper. Junpei saw another reactor, vivid in his mind because it had also exploded. He saw the cruel plague-doctor who had called himself Zero II and listened as he said the phrase, ‘Vive Hodie.’ Then, Junpei found himself lying in a foreboding chrysalis of alien technology, alongside Akane. The last thing Junpei heard each night before waking up – backlit by the explosions of eighteen annihilation reactors and a blood-red sky – were Akane’s words.
“I need you to forget, Junpei.”
Carlos lay in the infirmary, testing the strength of his injured right hand. According to the doctors, it had been two months since he had burned it and fallen, of which he’d spent all but a single week asleep. The fires that the exploding antimatter reactors had lit were mostly dying out, and it was once again safe to go outside as long as you were in a protective suit. Not that Carlos would be going outside himself: with his burn he would be a liability.
Carlos wanted to become useful again, which was why he spent every morning exercising his fingers and breaking through the pain.
On Carlos’ forty-ninth repetition, Junpei walked in. He march was stiff and irregular, but he still made quick forward progress, stopping about an arm’s length from the side of Carlos’ bed. He didn’t say anything, but just stared.
Carlos relaxed his hand and sat up, resting his back against the pillows. “Hey! Junpei! Good to see you! I thought you had forgotten me down here.”
Carlos continued to talk. “Anything important happened since then? I remember the plumbing was playing up before, but it has to be fixed by now. I’m still getting decent lunches, even for hospital food, so there can’t be anything wrong with Hydroponics. What about the reactor?”
Junpei glowered. “Carlos. We need to talk.”
“Junpei, what’s up?” Carlos chuckled weakly. “This is because I dropped you, isn’t it? I’m sorry about that.”
“Shut up!”
Junpei’s fist swung round, catching Carlos on his left cheek. Carlos was dazed for a moment as the back of his head clanged against the wall. Everyone in the medbay fell silent.
But Junpei didn’t. “You took Akane from me, you bastard! You don’t get to make jokes about that.”
Carlos froze. “You… you remembered.”
“I remember enough,” Junpei growled, “I remember how I met you, for the real first time, in D-Com. I remember that I finally found Akane there as well. And I remember how you helped her erase my memories so that I’d never know how close I’d come.”
“I didn’t erase your memories!” Carlos protested, “She did that by…”
“You lied to me, afterwards,” Junpei interrupted, “You kept me from looking for her. That’s as good as a complete betrayal. I’ve got the feeling you got a bit of experience with them back during the simulation.” Junpei looked away from Carlos in disgust. “You know… I had thought you’d brought me here because you were my friend. Should have guessed that the only reason you’d pretend to be such a good buddy was because she… because someone was threatening your precious Maria.”
Carlos tried to punch back against Junpei’s snide dismissal of his sister, but could only yelp as pain shot through his right hand. When the pain subsided, he asked, “How do you even know about that? You were unconscious when Akane threatened her.”
Junpei flinched at Akane’s name, but still answered. “How do I know? You talk. In your sleep.”
They glared at each other with silent anger for several minutes: Junpei standing tensely, Carlos leaning his head wearily against the wall. The other residents of the shelter – doctors and patients both – just watched: none of them wanted to get between the founders of the shelter. Eventually, Carlos worked up the strength of will to break the impasse.
“So, you found out. What now, Junpei?” he asked.
Junpei rested his forehead against his left palm, clawing at his hair with frustration. When he had an answer, he spoke. “Now you go.”
“‘Go’?”
“Go! Leave! Never come back!” Junpei roared, “That was the idea, wasn’t it? You babysit me for four months, and now that the world’s ended you get to leave and look for Maria, which is what you really wanted to do all the time you were here. Right?”
“Junpei, I…” Carlos stuttered. He wanted both. Not just to save Maria, unlikely as that was now, but also to be part of the community that Junpei and he had started. He wanted to survive the end of the world with Junpei. Carlos didn’t understand why Junpei couldn’t see that.
“Stop lying to me,” Junpei said, cutting off Carlos’ thoughts. He pointed upwards. “You can take your fire-engine out of here. I don’t want any more things left around to remind me of… people I’ve lost. Don’t worry: it still works. I checked it myself.”
In solemn silence, Junpei escorted Carlos out of the infirmary, to the elevator, to the changing room where the protective suits were stored and – once they both wore those suits – all the way to the ladder and the hatch to the outside world. With only three usable limbs, it took Carlos a while to climb, but he managed it, stepping for the first time under the red sky of the cruel new world.
When Carlos had sat down in the driver’s seat of the fire-truck, he looked forlornly back at Junpei. “I’m gonna miss you, Junpei. Are you really sure you want me to go?”
Junpei bowed his head. “I… I wish you had been who I thought you were, Carlos. But… I…” Junpei’s arms shook; Carlos could see how conflicted he was in his eyes. But eventually Junpei made his final decision. He slammed the truck’s door shut and ran back towards the shelter.
Carlos started the truck’s engine after a couple of spluttering whirs. The siren came to life, its wail forlornly quiet after the battering the ruck had taken. With one last look in the wing mirror Carlos started to drive, wondering if it could possibly have gone any other way.
Junpei regretted sending Carlos away from the moment he stepped back inside the shelter. He regretted everything he had said, but couldn’t even excuse himself by saying it was in the heat of the moment. There wasn’t even a way to call Carlos back and apologise: the radio that should have been in Carlos’ truck had been ripped from it.
Casting his protective suit aside, Junpei made his way back to the common room – the same one he and Carlos had talked in on their very first day. There were some people there, but one withering look from Junpei quickly emptied it.
Junpei turned on the television. It just showed static now: static matching that which buzzed and rumbled in Junpei’s mind. He looked over at the bar. It had started to look very welcoming. It was a way to forget what he had done because he had forgot.
One year later, Gab’s funeral was held. Junpei was drunk during it and didn’t remember a thing.
Six years after that, it was determined that the outside world was truly safe to return to, even without protection. Many of the inhabitants of the shelter started choosing to live outside, in whatever housing they could construct, and a small town formed around Junpei as he stayed still. With Carlos gone and Junpei indisposed, Emily became the de-facto leader and – while it was Junpei who named the town in a small moment of lucidity – it was Emily who most people knew as the first mayor of Fire’s End.
By the time the shelter’s stocks of alcohol had run dry, the town of Fire’s End had made contact with another community of survivors in Tennessee, and traders were bringing more whiskey into the town. Junpei welcomed its arrival, but he wasn’t the only one who needed it in the wake of the end of the world. The whiskey was expensive, even with the small gifts and discounts he got from those who had been there at the beginning and who remembered their respect for him.
Junpei joined the crews who drove west to the ruins of Las Vegas to scavenge. Despite his alcoholic haze, he found he had some talent for it, finding ways to extract useful electronic components from the derelict gambling machines without damaging them at all. Eventually, Junpei started going there alone. He was bringing back as much alone as any entire crew and becoming wealthy despite his spending, and the others preferred to work without his misery.
And then came Christmas Day, 2064. Fire’s End had swelled to about eight thousand people and the celebrations were starting, such as they were. But for once, Junpei was sober. Something inside him told him that it was not the day for that.
He was exploring the shelter – for nostalgia’s sake – when he came across a console whose lights were blinking furiously. It took him a while to recall what it had been used for, thirty-five years ago. Eventually, he remembered. It was connected to the perimeter sensors that he and Carlos had used when it had only been them. One of them, well away from the main trade routes, had activated.
Junpei could have ignored it. He could have told anyone else and then left it to them. But the same feeling inside told Junpei that it had to be him.
He took one of the protective suits, just in case. He chose the second converted fire-suit – the only one left after Carlos had left with the other – even though it wasn’t the closest. And then he left the shelter and made his way to the border of the town.
Junpei climbed a hill a stood there, looking over the desert in the direction that the sensor was located. For a moment, there didn’t seem to be anything out there, and Junpei almost turned back. But then, he saw it.
A blue light, twinkling like a star, glided across the horizon. It travelled across Junpei’s field of view before slowing to a halt. Forcing his aching legs forward, Junpei headed towards the location marked by where the blue star had come to rest.
As Junpei came closer, the source of the light formed in his sight like a mirage. It was a large red vehicle: a fire-truck, with its emergency lights dancing above it. An elderly man with greying hair climbed out of the driver’s seat and, clutching his side with one hand, tossed two packets to Junpei with the other.
“Don’t worry, Junpei,” the man called across the distance, “We’re both clean.”
Junpei knelt down and looked at the packets. They were both Radical-6 testing kits. They had both been legitimately used, and both declared their user healthy. Junpei stood up again and shouted back, “Okay! Wait… How do you know my name?! Who are you?”
Junpei looked again at the elderly man. This time, he saw the patches of blond poking through the white. He saw the red of a roughly-healed scar on the back of the man’s right hand. And he saw the determination to help people that blazed still in the man’s eyes: a determination that Junpei had expected never to see again.
“Carlos?”
The old man nodded with relief. “That’s right, Junpei.” Carlos bowed his head and continued, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I know I shouldn’t have come back, but I had…”
“You’re sorry?” Junpei asked, shimmers of guilt welling inside him. “Why are you sorry? Why on Earth didn’t you some back sooner?”
Carlos started to speak. “But you said…”
“You listened to what I said? Why would you do that? I’m an asshole, Carlos. A grade nine asshole. Please don’t listen to what I said before. Please stay.”
Carlos sighed mournfully. “It’s… I think it’s too late for that. I’m old now. And… I think I’m dying.” Carlos lifted his shirt to reveal an oozing wound on the side of his stomach. “I don’t believe I made it this far. We’re close, aren’t we? Please tell me I at least got close.”
Junpei pointed back towards the hill he had come down. “Yeah… It’s just over there.” Then, he turned back to Carlos, hands shaking angrily. “Is that it, Carlos?! You finally some back, just to tell me you’re dying? Really?!”
Carlos sighed, then pointed down at the testing kits at Junpei’s feet.
“What are you…?” Then Junpei stopped. He thought. “Wait… There’s two of them. Why did you give me two of them?”
“Because of this little guy,” Carlos answered. He turned around, then reached into the fire-truck and pulled out something wrapped in a large bundle of cloth. The cries of a baby could be heard within it. “I came back here because of him. He’s my great-nephew.”
Junpei gasped. “That would mean…!”
“That’s right,” Carlos answered, “I found her. I found Maria. She woke up once the epidemic had started, and found her way to a shelter just like ours. I don’t think it was a coincidence. I… I think Akane must have helped her. That was what she was talking about, back then. She wasn’t threatening Maria at all.
“Maria survived the explosions. By the time I got there, she had found someone she liked. About a year later, they started a family. I considered, a few times, trying to convince them to come with me back here with me, but…” Carlos coughed, a weak and weary hack. “I thought you wanted me to never return.
“But from yesterday, I didn’t have a choice. Maria’s shelter was attacked by raiders. Myrmidons. Soldiers working for Free the Soul. I was the only one who escaped, and I only just made it. This is all that’s left of my family, now.”
Carlos took a few unsteady steps forward, holding the baby in his arms out towards Junpei. “Junpei, you’re the only one I could possibly trust. You have to look after him. Please, forget what I did to you; it doesn’t matter now. Just…” Carlos trailed off; he finished his sentence only by placing the boy in Junpei’s welcoming arms.
Junpei looked down. The baby had a surprising but gratifying weight. Instinctively, he tussled the locks of blond hair that spilled from the top of the blankets, then moved the blanket aside to see the boy’s face.
Looking deeply into those curious, trusting eyes, Junpei couldn’t quite think of what to say. “H-How old is he?”
Carlos smiled. “He had his first birthday last month. November 17th.” Carlos’ eyes took on a hopeful glint. “So… Does this mean you’ll do it? Take him in; raise him once I’m gone?”
“Of course.”
“Thank you. I knew you’d come through.” His burden lifted, Carlos fell back towards the sand, staying upright only by leaning against the great wheel of the fire-engine.
“Carlos!” Junpei yelled in alarm. He raced to Carlos’ side, but couldn’t lean down without disturbing the baby in his arms.
Carlos brushed him away with a weak swing of his right arm. “It’s okay, Junpei. You have someone else to look after now.”
Carlos slumped against the wheel. His eyes closed peacefully. But he still had time for four final words.
“His name is Quark.”
As he walked back towards Fire’s End, Junpei looked down at the child in his arms: at the bright and innocent smile; at the messy hair whose colour reminded Junpei so much of Carlos. Warmth refilled Junpei’s heart.
Quark looked back up at him. “Gra-pa!” the baby babbled.
Happy Holidays to @bexbubbles! He wanted something winter holidays with Free the Soul, but it ended up as ‘Christmas with Dio’ instead. Aaah! I hope you like it, though! >.>
‘And the Word was
made Flesh,’ said A-01, voice the restless monotone of profound
boredom. Despite this, his words carried so that all the younger
clones heard him. The Great Hall was designed for this and A-01, if
nothing else, was a performer. Perhaps the boredom was likewise only
a performance.
D-10 felt the
delicious frisson of horror at A-01’s words. Made
Flesh, how sinful it sounded with all
the trappings of mortality that came with the cage of rotting meat.
Forget that they were all bags of rotting meat, in the end. The flesh
wasn’t what interested Free the Soul.
‘And dwelt amongst
us,’ A-01 was still talking. ‘Like him, we are trapped within our
bodies, along with millions of people who do not realise this and
seek all the pleasures and sins of the flesh. But like him, we
are meant to rise above that.’
D-10 applauded with everyone else. Rising above
the flesh: that was their goal.
They weren’t
allowed to leave the compound until they were of age, and even then
they could only go when they’re on a sanctioned mission: for the
cause of their beliefs.
That Dio was here,
in a pub nursing a Johnny Walker, was as far from a sanctioned
mission as he could get without setting up with a circus troupe and a
dancing bear.
It was 25 December
and he had been expecting the pub to be empty, what with all the family
gatherings and Christmas dinners. But the place was packed: couples
having drinks before going home and fornicating, singles looking to
hook up, friends getting shit-faced and shouting loudly at each
other. You’d think after the Apocalypse there’d be less people gadding about, or that the survivors would be making less noise. It was
overwhelming, so very human and crass.
Dio loved the fuck
out of it.
He was well on his
own way to getting shit-faced when someone sat on the stool next to him
and said, ‘Pretty thing sitting all alone here, imagine that.’
‘Are you,’ said
Dio, waving his hand when the words failed his alcohol-befuddled
brain. ‘Hitting on me?’
‘Oh my god,’
said the girl. A girl, Dio realised, had just come on to him. What
was the world coming to? He had to admit that she was rather pretty,
with a small and gentle face framed by a ragged fringe. But that
wasn’t the point. The point was—
‘I thought you
were a girl and you looked lonely, so I went to ask if you wanted to
hang out with me and my friends,’ girl said, in a rush. She was
blushing, covering her mouth with her hands. ‘Oh my god, I’m so
sorry. It was a joke, and I just.’
‘You’re nice,’
said Dio, surprised into honesty.
She lowered her
hands so he could see her smile. ‘Everyone’s nice if you give
them a chance.’
Dio stood up; hand
resting on the back of his chair for balance when it seemed like the
world was turning upside down on him. Before the girl could ask him
if he’s all right (she was just like that, she had the sort of face
that worried over other people too much, Dio could tell), he left
some bills to cover his tab on the counter and left.
‘I honestly don’t think so,’ said Dio, as
the door of the pub tinkled close behind him.
His last
Christmas—that is, Dio was fairly sure it was
his last, knowing what he did about his upcoming mission and how Free the Soul
felt about him—was spent going through the plans, making sure he
had the blueprints for Rhizome 9 memorised, and praying.
It was a dangerous
and risky mission, only something Dio could accomplish; he understood
that. He also understood that his standing with Free the Soul was
tenuous, and that he might not get out of the moon base alive. They
had nothing to lose, sending him in: if he survived, the mission was
secure and they would have won. If he didn’t, well—he would have to
ensure that they would still win. Getting rid of the problematic
leader of the Myrmidons and putting a stop to the AB Project, it was
practically a coup de grace.
And Dio? He’ll just
have to make sure he survived. That was all. He could still earn back
his Brother’s trust. He couldn’t give himself room for doubts.
He checked the bombs he’d
hidden in the secret pockets of his coat and tucked the detonator
under his hat. He’d like to think he didn’t hesitate before slipping
the pills into his pocket as well. They were insurance, something he
hoped he wouldn’t have to use, but knowing he had them made him feel
at ease. If he had to go, he’d like to do so on his own terms.
He could feel the weight
of them in his pocket, heavier than the bombs can ever be.
He wondered who the fuck
he was supposed to pray to.
Dio sighed and left his rooms. He had a Project to fuck up.
B.
They had a couple hours to
kill. Funny choice of words, after what Dio had done to that old
woman. She hadn’t even had the time to resist.
He chose a bottle from the
bar at random. Planet, it said on the label. There were glasses along
the counter, something Sigma and his group must have used to solve
the puzzles in the lounge, and Dio took one as well.
‘Mind if I join you?’
Dio turned around and saw
the old man standing by the door. He hadn’t heard it open, and Dio
gritted his teeth.
‘I would,’ he said. ‘But
something tells me you’ll come in anyway.’
Tenmyouji just laughed and
shouldered past him. He took more care in choosing his beverage,
bringing out a squat bottle of whiskey from the back of the bar and
making appreciative old man noises.
Dio fought the urge to
whack him on the back of the head with it.
‘Are you old enough to
drink?’ said Tenmyouji. He was grinning, but there was a flintiness
to his eyes. The old man didn’t like Dio; Dio was aware of that. He
hadn’t made an effort to be likeable; that wasn’t part of the plan.
‘I dare you to fucking
stop me,’ said Dio, taking a sip from his glass and raising his
eyebrow at Tenmyouji, ‘even if I weren’t.’
‘Fucking ray of sunshine.’
‘I try.’ Dio snorted.
‘You’ll survive. Or maybe not.’
‘You’re sure of yourself.’
Tenmyouji drank his whiskey and frowned, as if something was wrong
with it. Dio knew that wasn’t the case; the whiskey was pretty good
shit, judging from the label.
‘Wouldn’t be here if I
weren’t.’
To his surprise, Tenmyouji
laughed. ‘You remind me of someone I knew once,’ he said, in answer
to Dio’s glare.
Dio didn’t doubt it. The
years on the old man: he’d probably known all sorts. ‘And?’
‘Didn’t like him much
either,’ said Tenmyouji. ‘But him, I understood. You? Thank fuck I
don’t.’
Dio tried to let this go.
He wasn’t terribly interested in the old man’s memories. But there
was something about Tenmyouji—the expression on his face maybe, or
the dismissive way he talked of Dio. So he said, ‘Remind you how?’
‘Dead eyes,’ said Tenmyouji, promptly. ‘Like I’m looking at the
shadow of a man.’
A.
When Dio opened his eyes,
Luna was crouching in front of him.
‘How do you feel?’ she
said, eyeing the hand that was cuffed to the sink. She was frowning,
looking more distracted than scared, as if she wasn’t alone in a room
with a murderer.
Sure, Dio hadn’t actually
killed anyone in the moon base, but not for any lack of trying.
‘I feel fucking great,’
said Dio. What the fuck do you think? he wanted to add, but she
wasn’t scared of him and he held his tongue.
‘Ms Kurashiki will be here
soon,’ said Luna.
‘Gonna take care of me, is
she?’ said Dio, trying to keep the fear from his voice.
‘She’ll decide what to do
with you.’ Luna stood up. ‘Would you like something to drink?’
Dio thought of the pills
in his pocket and his free hand moved to take one out. Luna sat back
down again and grabbed his hand. She was quicker than he expected,
and stronger than she looked.
‘Please don’t do anything
rash.’
Fuck that. He’d already
failed. What else was there for him? He didn’t even need to die. Free
the Soul or Akane Kurashiki would take care of that.
‘Leave me alone,’ said
Dio, knowing that he sounded like a little boy. A brat, like Quark.
(Quark wasn’t too bad, if Dio was going to be honest, but he was safe
somewhere and Dio wasn’t. Quark was a brat.)
Luna nodded. Before Dio
could react, she reached inside his pocket and took the pills away.
As if in exchange, she gave him a smile before buttoning the door
closed.
Dio started to cry.
They hadn’t killed him
yet. He was out of their reach, so long as Kurashiki kept him close.
She wanted him to break, even knowing the secrets he could spill were
meagre drops from the fount of Free the Soul. She probably knew all
his secrets. And still.
She also knew she wouldn’t have to lift a finger: Dio was perfectly
capable of breaking himself.
‘What’s this?’ said Dio,
looking at the tray of food Luna had placed on the table. They had
him locked up in the Crew’s Quarters; his freedom comprising the run
of four cabins and his only company the lewd poster Sigma and
Tenmyouji had been so sweet on.
And sometimes,
occasionally, Luna.
She was the only one in
Rhizome 9 who bothered. Dio thought she must bored.
‘Christmas dinner,’ said
Luna, proud as if she’d made it herself. Dio was pretty sure all she
did was heat the dishes up. There weren’t any fresh produce in the
moon base, just a year’s supply of pre-packaged slop. There was
turkey and pie and some pudding. They haven’t been starving him, but
the fare hadn’t been too good either. This was definitely a step up.
‘I don’t do Christmas.’
‘Then it’s a normal
dinner,’ said Luna, stoutly. ‘But with better food.’
He couldn’t argue with that
logic.
‘Merry Christmas,
Dio,’ said Luna, before leaving.
Sated with the
not-Christmas dinner, Dio found himself saying, ‘Merry Christmas’ to the closed door.
I really hope this turned out alright. I tried to combine all three of the prompts into one so hopefully its not too nonsensical. Enjoy.
Happy holidays, arohoratio!
–
“This is going to be wonderful, Aoi.” Anake smiled as she placed a decoration on their small tree.
Her brother nodded. He ran his fingers through his white hair. For whatever reason he liked wearing tank tops regardless of the season. It was no wonder he was constantly cold, but that didn’t stop him.
Anake signed, “Aoi, please put on a jacket. I know it’s not freezing in here yet, but it will be.”
He shook his head, “Anake, I’m just fine. Don’t worry about me.” He hands her another Christmas ornament.
This year, the siblings actually had Christmas lights on their small house. It was up in the mountains of Nevada. It was secluded, but pleasant. Aoi and Anake worked in a small town near a nearby forest for the winter months they weren’t in school. They had enough money to put up some better Christmas decorations this year. The sight was rather beautiful. Aoi had lined lights around the house and Anakae decorated some nearby trees in what they considered their yard. It was cute, but not too flashy.
Suddenly, Anake started shivering.
Aoi laughed, “Looks like you’re the one who needs a jacket.”
Anake glared at him.
“…Would you like some hot chocolate?”
“Yes, brother.” She stopped glaring and went back to being cheery, “That would be lovely.”
Aoi walked to the kitchen and prepared hot chocolate for himself and his sister.
Anake softly called from the living room, “Aoi?”
“Yes?”
“Do… do we have any… marshmallows?”
Aoi let out a very annoyed sigh, “What? You wanna straw too?!”
Anake was silent for a moment. Without her reply, Aoi retreated from the kitchen with two hot chocolates in hand.
He held the coco out for her to grab and she took it. She stirred it with her straw while looking down at the floor with a sad look on her face. Aoi did nothing but grumble and take a sip of his drink.
“Why… are you so upset with me?” She sounded concerned and a bit hurt.
This time there was a brief silence from Aoi.
He shook his head, “Sis, I’m sorry. I’m not angry at you. I’m a bit upset at myself.”
“What? Why?” The hurt left her voice and full on concern took over.
His fiddled with the handle on his mug, “You… asked Santa for a special gift. The gift of seeing your friends.”
The room blew with something that felt like a cold wind. Anake shivered, as did Aoi but he seemed to hide it better.
“Aoi… as long as I get to spend Christmas with you like this then I’m just fine! Really!” She places her mug on a nearby coffee table and stands up. She holds her arms wide for a hug.
“Bah.” He takes another sip of his drink.
“Hehe, humbug?” Anake finishes his statement, “Come on, Aoi. Lets finish our drinks then play in the snow… please?”
He laughs, “Alright, alright.”
They finish their drinks and Aoi grabs something from between the couch cushions.
“Hey, don’t forget your black scarf, Anake.”
“Oh! Right! It was one of my favorite Christmas presents!”
“You’ve said that to every Christmas present I’ve given you.”
The siblings after grabbing coats and jackets went out into the snow. Anake instantly flopped into it, giggling and enjoying herself.
She smiles while making a snow angel, “You know Aoi? I definitely prefer the cold to the heat? You know?”
“Yeah… it’s nothing like a furnace, right?” Aoi tried to laugh but it was very choked up.
Trying to change the topic as quickly as possible, Aoi balls up a snowball and hurls it at his sister.
“Hey!” She balled one up as well and threw it back.
Soon it became an all out snowball fight between them. Snow was flying everywhere and laughter from the siblings filled the air.
Suddenly, there was rustling from the trees. Aoi was on alert immediately. He quickly grabbed Anake.
“Inside, now.” He told her.
She quickly went inside. But then the rustling stopped. Aoi was prepared for whatever it was to finally come out of the trees.
But when it did…
“What… a… a cat?” He was rather confused, “Anake wouldn’t want me to leave it out here…”
Aoi picked up the cat and brought it inside.
Anake was taking off her jacket, although leaving her scarf on.
“Aoi?”
“Yeah?”
“….is that a cat?”
“Yeah.”
They stared at each other for a moment then looked at the cat. It was likely an adult cat. It had green eyes and had a black coat.
“…I figured you’d want me to bring it inside.”
Anake instantly grabbed the cat from Aoi, “Well of course I do! Look at em! It’s so cute!”
She held the cat and pet it. She seemed rather content.
Aoi sighed and plopped himself back on the couch.
Then the door slammed open,
“Hello!”
Aoi instantly got up while Anake held the cat away from whoever opened the door.
“…Lotus?”
“Mhm! And some …others.”
The room soon became crowded with familiar faces. The Light siblings, Seven, Sigma, Alice, and of course, Lotus.
“Hello everyone!” Anaked placed the cat down. “I’m… I’m so happy to see you all!”
Aoi nodded at everyone, “It’s … nice to see you all.”
“Hey… where’s Jumpy?”
“He was right behind us just meow.” Sigma chimed in.
Alice sighed, “Not this again…”
Anake giggled then Clover came up and gave Anake a hug.
“Good to see you.”
“You too, Clover.”
“WE HAVE TO GO BACK!” A loud yell from the outside of the house bellowed.
“Ah yes, now I remempurr. He was pretending to be Marty McFly from Back to the fupurr.”
Alice glared at Sigma, “Can someone please shut that man up? Please?”
Anake went out into the yard again to hug Junpei.
“Hey, McFly. How is the…. future treating you?”
“Well… if I told you that there’d be a paradox!” Junpei exclaimed.
Aoi called from the door, “You two will catch a cold, come back inside you stupid love birds!”
Anake pulled Junpei by the wrist and dragged him back to the cabin.
Suddenly, she fainted.
“Ah!” Anake awoke from her dream.
“Kurashiki?”
“Klim?”
“Are you alright?”
“….yes.” She rose from her bed, “I’m just fine. Let us continue on with the project now… shall we?”
Gift to thefireinthewire! I really hope you enjoy this present and have a fantastic Christmas. I do apologise if any facts about VLR are inaccurate; I played the game quite some time ago and since then, no longer have a copy D:
Title: Maternal Inclinations Summary: “Luna trying to be a mother to Kyle.”
—
She watched him breathe in and out slowly, her hand hovering over his face.
What was she doing?
Luna exhaled – an unnecessary action, but a convincing one for those who did not know the truth about her – and drew away from Kyle. She clasped her hands together tightly; it was a mannerism programed into her, but right then, it felt wrong.
From the moment Kyle had been discovered in the garden, Luna had been drawn towards him. She wasn’t in any way worried that he was still unconscious, but she felt she needed to be beside him when he did wake up. She would have to check him for any signs of disorientation, make sure he was well hydrated, get him to eat something light, let him know that he was oka-
She paused. That last one was going above her duties as a nurse. It was her role to make her patients feel comfortable, but not in the way she was inclined to with Kyle. Rather than explain the situation and answer any questions he might have, Luna planned on embracing him, stroking his hair, speaking to him soothingly about nothing but good things.
Logically, that didn’t make sense to her. Doing so would not help Kyle’s physical health, and therefore, it was unnecessary.
Then why did she have these instincts to try?
Her hand stretched towards him again, and before she really knew it herself, his smooth, brown locks were sliding through her fingers with ease. She repeated the action a few times, finding herself in awe.
It was as though this was exactly what she was meant to do.
Soon, she wound up her necklace and hummed along to the gentle song that began to trickle out, its sound light yet clear. Watching the peaceful look on Kyle’s face, Luna smiled.
Kyle had never accepted her in his life, despite how hard she’d tried. He’d detested the fact that she was what she was and never allowed her to see him. She’d spent many long hours waiting outside his room, not only because she’d been ordered to, but because not seeing Kyle made her worried.
She’d always worried about him.
Here with him now, able to help him in the way she’d always wanted, Luna couldn’t have been happier. It felt as though she had all of her pieces in the right places.
She supposed that Kyle was approximately the same age she was intended to be, but she felt far older and wiser than him. Because of this, she was responsible for him, responsible for not only his protection, but his happiness.
Looking at his face again, which she’d only ever seen covered in armor, Luna realised that there were many similarities between Kyle and Doctor Klim. Of course there were; they shared the same DNA. Doctor Klim’s face may have darkened and hollowed from the heavy burden his years of work brought, but looking at Kyle, she knew he showed the younger man Klim had once been.
It was possible, she supposed, that her strong affection for Kyle in this moment was because of everything she owed Doctor Klim, for his kindness to her over the years. But somehow, she didn’t think that was all.
Of course she felt – felt? – she owed Doctor Klim, but Kyle was somebody else. Despite the strangeness of the situation, her mind remained logical enough to recognise that fact. Her inclinations towards Kyle were different and unconnected to Doctor Klim and the order he’d given her long ago; “Be a mother for Kyle.”
She genuinely wanted to comfort Kyle. The order seemed obsolete and unnecessary. Right then, she was doing just that, and it was the most content she’d ever been.
Her optimism faltered when she remembered that Kyle was not letting her do this. Kyle was not enjoying her presence as she’d always hoped; he was incapable of doing so. Currently, she was loving an empty vessel. How could she possibly consider that a victory?
She drew her hand away from him quickly, as though she had been burned. She was using him so she could fill a void that only seemed to grow the more she became aware of it. This was not her role, and before she knew it, shame flowed through her. Luna rose, standing few feet back from him. Her hands clasped together again, though the act still felt wrong.
Soon after, Luna concluded that he was close to waking up. The slow twitching of his body made the fact certain. She wondered how he would react to her presence, and she stood by him anxiously.
“Please,” she whispered to herself. “Just give me a chance.”
When Kyle did awaken, he seemed more passive towards her, as well as alert, than she had expected. Speaking of things that he shouldn’t have known about, Luna could only answer his questions one by one, barely having a chance to process the events.
Then, too quickly, he was gone. As soon as he left in search of the others, there was only one fact Luna was certain of.
The consciousness currently inhabiting Kyle’s body was not his own.
Crouched down on the floor of the infirmary, her hands wrapped tightly around her own body, Luna felt as though everything she’d tried to do was in vain. The only time she’d ever had the chance to express how much she genuinely loved Kyle Klim was when he wasn’t Kyle at all. The room was silent, save for her choked sobs that felt more real than she’d even known before.
If the pain she was experiencing wasn’t genuine, then nothing was.