To: @eatingfireflies

From: @interabangs

Happy Holidays! eatingfireflies asked for Team C’s first Christmas together. I hope you like it!

AO3 link

“Ugh,” Junpei said, “Christmas.”

He was sitting on the couch in Carlos’s living room, resting his head all the way back with his hand thrown over his face.

Akane frowned as she stood in front of the couch. She knew what Junpei was thinking: maybe if he just hid out here – or under Carlos’s covers – all day on December 25, Junpei could pretend the day just didn’t exist.

It was a tempting thought, but Akane had made plans, for Christ’s sake. Literally.

“Junpei!” she chided, taking a seat next to him, “how could you not be in the spirit?”

He mumbled something, his hand still shielding his face.

Akane stifled a sigh. “Look, I know you’re frustrated that we still haven’t caught the terrorist and prevented the world from ending —”

“— And that we still haven’t gotten married —”

“— But Christmas is about celebration, and love, and family! We need to cherish the time we have together, while we still have it!” She clenched her hand into a resolute fist, but Junpei still wouldn’t look at her.

“Okay, well, that’s great and all, but I’ve heard this speech about a dozen times already. It’s starting to lose its meaning.”

Akane couldn’t hold back a sigh this time. Before she opened her mouth to continue arguing, the front door to Carlos’s apartment opened wide, revealing her and Junpei’s visibly tired fiancé, his face bearing a light coating of soot as well as a slowly spreading smile at seeing who was in his apartment. Well, basically it was their apartment, at least until Akane could convince them into moving into a much bigger place.

She grinned at the sight of Carlos’s engagement ring, sparkling on his left hand, as well as hers. Akane and Carlos had picked one out for Junpei too, but he’d almost lost it a couple of times while on missions for both Crash Keys and his detective work with Seven, so he’d decided to leave his ring safely tucked away in the night stand next to the bed.

“Hey, you two. I miss out on any fun while I was gone?” Carlos asked as he shrugged off his jacket and put it on the coat rack.

Akane glanced over at Junpei, who had now changed his dramatically splayed out hand-on-face position to crossing his arms and glaring at the floor. “No,” she said, “just the usual spoilsport attitude from Grumpei here about the upcoming holiday.”

Carlos settled himself on the stool by the counter and carefully pulled off his boots. “That again? C’mon, Junpei, I thought you were cool about inviting all the others over for Christmas Eve. Maria’s bringing three pies, we’ll get to see Sean’s new head, and Diana’s gonna play the tambourine for everyone! It’ll be great.”

“It’s not that,” Junpei muttered, but at least he looked up at Carlos. “I just… what with the whole terrorist still being out there and the possibility of the world ending, I don’t really feel like being in the Christmassy mood right now.”

“Well, I think we should help get you in the holiday spirit.” Akane put her hand under her chin and thought for a moment, crossing her legs and tapping her foot in the air. She was momentarily distracted by the sight of Carlos putting his shoes by the door, and her heart swelled a bit, like it did every morning she woke up in his and Junpei’s arms. It was a small thing, but even in Carlos’s own home, he’d made a habit of taking his shoes off, like Junpei and Akane were used to.

“That’s it!” she cried, and both guys looked at her with that telltale ‘What’s she thought of now?’ expression she’d seen many times on their faces, both in meetings and in bed.

“Uh, what’s it?” Junpei asked, his arms still crossed.

Akane grabbed onto his right arm, unable to contain her excitement. “We’ll have a gift exchange. To show our appreciation for each other!”

“I thought we weren’t gonna get each other anything,” Carlos reminded her. “I mean, you’re the co-CEO of Crash Keys. You could have anything you want.”

“But this won’t be about what we get for each other,” Akane argued, turning her head toward him. “It’ll be about the meaning behind it. Look, to make it less about the present and more about the intention, let’s do a secret exchange. Put our names in a hat, and pick them out!”

“Secret Santa?” Carlos asked, raising an eyebrow as he put his arms on his hips. “Huh. That… might not be such a bad idea.”

Junpei blew out a sharp breath, something that sounded like a chuckle and grunt. Akane whirled back around toward him, swinging her purple stockinged feet up on his lap. He cried out and his arms uncrossed, but she could already see the gleam of intrigue in his eyes.

“Come on, Junpei,” she said, wiggling her toes as they hung over the side of his legs. “It’ll be fun! The surprise will make it even better.”

“All right, all right,” he said, a smile slowly starting at the corners of his mouth. “Just don’t say it’ll be a blast. I’ve had enough of that.” He curled his right arm around her waist and pulled her toward him.

She framed his face with her hands as they leaned in for a long, deep kiss.

“There room for one more?” Carlos asked when they finally separated.

Junpei and Akane each grabbed onto one of his hands and pulled him onto them as Akane said, “Oh, Carlos.”

“There’s always room for you,” Junpei said.

Akane beamed, especially when their clothes started coming off.

She was going to make sure this would be a Christmas none of them would ever forget.

Akane paused before entering the living room, and bent to adjust the red bow on her green sweater-dress.

She had spent weeks preparing for this moment. She even brought a fail-safe, just in case, but she was sure she wasn’t going to need it.

This was going to be perfect.

As Akane neared the living room, she marveled again at how perfect the setting already looked. A week ago, Hazuki and her daughters had come over to Carlos’s apartment and helped her decorate the place. Wreaths hung from green, gold and red ribbons on the wall opposite the couch. A medium-sized fir tree was nestled in the corner of the living room, next to the long couch, thanks to Seven and Sigma’s help. Diana brought a bunch of aromatherapy candles and a list of holiday songs to play on the stereo system Aoi had rigged to a speaker system, which you could hear from all the corners of the living room, kitchen, and tiny dining room. Phi… had spent most of her time on the stool next to the kitchen bar, playing some Battleship phone app game with Aoi when she wasn’t critiquing the way Sigma hung tree ornaments – but, to her credit, Phi did bring an excellent choice of whiskey, and pomegranate juice for Junpei.  Maria could only come over for a couple hours since she had to study for her final exams, but she had brought the tree topper, a ceramic, golden star she had herself made and brought tears to everyone’s eyes.

Eric and Sean lived too far away to help, and Mira was still in prison, but Eric sent over one of his mom’s favorite ornaments to hang from the tree, and a card from Mira that said, “If we don’t die by the time you see this, Merry Christmas I guess.” Sean sent over a large, professional-looking painting depicting most of the Nonary and Decision game participants standing in front of a gorgeous, tall evergreen tree. Akane had it framed on the wall over the couch. She kept her gaze on it as she entered the living room, all the lights dimmed low so the aromatherapy candles in the dining room flickered on their tall, ornate holders.

Carlos and Junpei’s backs were facing her as they looked up at the painting, and they turned around, their wrapped presents in their hands as Akane approached them. The candlelight accentuated their handsomeness and, for the millionth time, Akane was struck by just how lucky she was to be here, with them.

She gripped her own gift in her hands as she smiled, feeling truly serene and centered for the first time in many timelines.

“Merry Christmas, Akane,” Carlos said.

“Merry Christmas to you too,” she replied.

They both looked at Junpei, and after a moment of silence, she raised an eyebrow.

“Oh, all right,” he said, smoothing down his maroon dress shirt with his free hand. “Same to both of you.”

“Well,” Carlos said, holding up his present, “let’s exchange!”

The three of them ended up just sort of awkwardly standing there for a long moment, the soft holiday music filling up the silence as they held out their presents, yet didn’t seem to know how to give and receive their gifts.

“Fine, you know what? I’ll go first,” Junpei said, handing Carlos a medium-sized box in gold wrapping that Akane could tell Junpei had done himself. It made her happy to note that he had gone to the trouble himself.

“All right. Could you hold onto mine while I unwrap this? Thanks.” Carlos and Junpei exchanged their presents and soon, the gold wrapping fell to the floor as Carlos held up a box of a…

“Polaroid camera!” Carlos said. “I remember these! They’re kinda rare now, aren’t they?”

“Well,” Junpei said with a shrug, though Akane could see him smiling, “I know a guy.”

“I think we all know him,” Akane teased as Carlos peered at the writing on the box. “Although, now that I think about it, this could’ve been done with the help of either Aoi or Seven.”

“A Santa never reveals his secrets,” Junpei said, actually chuckling.

“This is in mint condition,” Carlos marveled, running his hand along the smooth edges of the box.

“Yeah, uh, I figure you can use it with Maria, to help create new memories,” Junpei said, and Akane could almost see him blushing in the flickering candlelight.

“I will, and I’ll do the same with you two,” Carlos vowed. “Although the pictures will be drastically different.” He leaned in toward Junpei and, while his free hand strayed down toward Junpei’s hip, he gave his thanks for the present with his lips.

“Wow,” Junpei said, dazedly pulling away as Akane grinned. “Guess this wasn’t such a bad idea after all.”

“I’ve got your present, Akane,” Carlos said, setting the camera box down on the coffee table and holding out his much, much smaller gift-wrapped box.

Akane took it after tucking the present she had to give under her arm, and eagerly ripped off the wrapping paper.

Underneath it was a small, nondescript brown box, but inside was a folded piece of paper. Akane unfolded it and peered down at the writing.

“I see a name, and address… some kind of passcode… Carlos, is this a lead?” she asked, looking up at him, her eyes shining.

Junpei’s eyes widened. “What, to the terrorist?”

Carlos nodded. “I figured since you’ve told us so many times that you have everything you want, why not get something you need?”

A tear trickled down Akane’s cheek. She reached out and embraced Carlos, sniffling, and he rubbed her back. “I would’ve given it to you sooner, but I just got that source verified this morning. Hopefully this’ll help all of us.”

“Thank you. Thank you so much!”

“So, this is shaping up to be a pretty magical Christmas, after all! Especially now that it’s my turn,” Junpei said as Akane and Carlos parted.

“Oh, right,” she said, wiping her eyes and handing him a very fancily wrapped box. “Merry Christmas, Junpei.”

He ripped the wrapping paper off in record time and it was still fluttering to the floor as he opened the box.

“It’s…” he said, holding out his gift.

“It’s…” Carlos said, squinting his eyes to look at it.

“It’s a…” Akane echoed.

“It’s a watch!”

The Christmas music playing in the background suddenly skipped a beat, played normally, then skipped another beat. Carlos hurriedly excused himself to check out the problem, and made a beeline for the kitchen.

Junpei dangled the watch in the air between two fingers, almost, Akane noticed with a frown, as if he didn’t want to hold it.

“It’s a gold watch!” Akane said as the skipping music finally stopped. “For detectives, right? It’s just, you’ve been doing so much amazing work, and —”

“— Gold watches are for retirement!” Junpei sputtered, dropping the shiny device back into the box and holding it back out to her with both hands. “And I thought you, of all people, would know better than to get me a watch, of all things.”

“Jumpy,” Akane said, her voice wavering as tears began to prick the corners of her eyes. “I didn’t mean to…”

“Don’t try to ‘Jumpy’ yourself out of this, Akane,” he whispered.

Just then, Carlos flipped on the lights just then, and Akane got to see the full force of betrayal and anguish in Junpei’s eyes.

“Yeah,” he said, his voice softer, but no less miserable, “you just didn’t realize, did you?”

No. No. This was supposed to be perfect! This wasn’t supposed to happen. They were all supposed to have a lovely pre-Christmas gift exchange, fall into bed, and be blissfully happy for a couple of days before regrouping to track down the terrorist and save humanity together.

She sighed, wiping the tears before they could fall and turning to set her own present down on the coffee table instead of taking the watch back from Junpei.

“I hoped it wouldn’t have to come to this,” she said, digging around in the small bag she had strapped to her waist.

“Hey, Akane,” Carlos said, walking over to join her and Junpei, “What are you —”

But he was too late. Swiftly, before the others could react, Akane pulled out a taser and pressed it to her collarbone, then flicked it on.

ZAP!

When she opened her eyes, she was lying on the ground.

“H-hey, Akane!”

“Are you all right?”

Slowly, she opened her eyes, groaning at the dull throbbing sensation she sometimes felt when she SHIFTed.

Junpei knelt beside her, lifting her upper body into a sitting position as Carlos hovered over them, holding a glass of water. He held it out to her and she took it, drinking deeply.

“Thanks,” she said, handing the glass back after emptying most of it.

“You gotta stop doing this,” Junpei murmured, running his hand through her hair before kissing her forehead. Warmth flooded through Akane at his kiss, and she brightened even more as she took in her surroundings.

The lights were dimmed, and the candles flickered from the dining room. The lights on the Christmas tree in the corner glowed comfortingly. Wreaths hung on the walls opposite the couch, where there was still the large portrait of the Nonary and Decision Game participants.

“What day is this?” Akane asked.

“December 25^th,” Carlos said, setting down the cup and putting his hands on his hips, frowning down at her slightly. “We should probably get you to a hospital.”

“What? No!” Akane said, scrambling to her feet as Junpei cried out in alarm. “We haven’t exchanged our presents yet, have we?”

“No,” Carlos said, gesturing at the brightly-colored boxes on the coffee table. “We were just about to, but I don’t think this is the right time for that.”

Akane looked down at them, and beamed. “This is the perfect time.” And what might’ve been the perfect timeline, considering neither of them were accusing her right away of SHIFTing.

“Uh, are you sure you’re all right? I mean, you did just collapse,” Junpei pointed out, also standing now and rubbing the back of his head.

“I’ll be fine,” Akane said, trying not to seem too impatient but finding it difficult. “Let’s see…” She squinted and saw her handwriting on a small, thin box that read ‘To Carlos,’ then picked it up.

“Merry Christmas, Carlos,” she announced, presenting the box to him with both hands and a wide, hopeful smile.

He reached out toward it, then paused, his hand outstretched in midair as he glanced over at Junpei. “You think it’s okay to just… continue?”

Before Junpei could answer, Akane said, “Urgh, we can go to the hospital after we open our presents! Come on, Carlos, just take it!” When he looked back her, his expression apprehensive, she said in a more reassuring tone, “I’ll be fine. Promise.”

Slowly, he took the box from her, and ripped off the wrapping paper. Akane was just as curious to see what his gift was, and when he lifted the lid of a thin, white box, she gasped, her heartbeat thrumming away in her ears.

“It’s a wallet!” Carlos cried.

“Hey,” Junpei said, peering at it. “That’s pretty nice.”

“Oh, thank God!” Akane said.

They both turned to look at her.

“Akane,” Junpei said, his mouth thinning into a frown, “what’s going on here?”

“N-nothing!” she squeaked, getting a closer look at the wallet. After a moment, it clicked. It’s what she had vaguely thought about getting Carlos if she ended up picking his name when they had drawn the pieces of paper out of his firefighter’s helmet.

“That’s made out of a fire hose,” she explained as the guys continued staring at her, Carlos’s mouth parting in surprise. “I made it myself.” In reality, she had probably gotten help from Aoi or Ennea, but it technically wasn’t a lie because Akane wasn’t getting any flashes of memory from this timeline. And hopefully, if they did start to suspect her of SHIFTing, she had successfully distracted them.

“It’s great! No, it’s more than that. I love it,” Carlos said, pulling her in for a gentle hug. “And you too, if that wasn’t already clear.”

“Mmm,” she sighed, leaning her head against his chest. She and Carlos both looked over at Junpei, who was still looking both bewildered and, unfortunately, like he still suspected something was up.

After a moment, he sighed and picked up a box from the coffee table, handing it out to Akane.

“I, uh, don’t know if you’ll like it, but here’s hoping anyway.”

Akane reached out to take it with a grateful smile, and within seconds, the wrapping paper fluttered to the floor.

“Junpei!” she gasped. “It’s beautiful!”

It was a long, thin wooden box with her name engraved on the top. She ran her finger over it, and when she slid open the panel, it revealed two wooden chopsticks with her name also engraved on the upper portion, with an intricate pattern carved into the thick ends.

“I, uh, tried doing it myself before ending up with a bunch of scrap wood, so I decided to get it professionally done. Except for the hearts,” Junpei added, and Akane turned the chopsticks around to see two crudely drawn hearts etched into the wood on the sides opposite her name.

She pressed them to her chest as she stepped out of Carlos’s embrace and into Junpei’s, her tears flowing freely.

“Good work, babe,” Carlos said to him over her head, and Junpei groaned, “I told you not to call me that.”

“Aw, come on. It’s better than that whole month I tormented you with ‘honey’ and ‘sweetheart,’ isn’t it?”

Akane’s laugh was muffled by Junpei’s chest, and she pulled away so Carlos could hand his present to Junpei.

“Might as well finish this up before we go to the hospital,” Carlos said while Junpei tore the wrapping paper apart.

He stared at it, one arm slung over Akane’s shoulder as his free hand held out the box so he could look at the cover.

Akane glanced at it too and she looked up at Junpei.

“What’s wrong?”

“It… Uh.” Junpei flipped the box over to look at the back, and then looked at the front. “It’s a DVD.”

“Of Back to the Future III!” Carlos said. “You said you liked it, right?”

Junpei didn’t say anything for a while. Worry started to creep in on the edges of Akane’s contentment.

“Well, I guess I did,” Junpei said, “but I didn’t, y’know, love it.”

The background music started skipping, and Akane groaned as she stepped out of Junpei’s side hug.

“What do you mean? It’s a great movie,” Carlos asked. Akane went over to the kitchen to try to fix the music.

“I guess, but… I dunno. It’s just not the same as the first two.”

“But it’s so much fun! Remember the part when they —”

“— Yeah, I know, it was cool, but as a whole, this just can’t top the same feeling of the first one. What happened, was that DVD sold out?”

“No, but I just figured you’d want to watch this one again. Y’know, because you said you haven’t seen it as much as the other two.”

“Right, and there’s a reason for that,” Junpei said as Akane gave up on fixing the small music device Aoi had set up and turned it off.

“I don’t get it,” Carlos said, starting to sound exasperated, a tone of voice Akane had rarely heard, coming from him, “It’s a good movie!”

“But it has so many plotholes!” Junpei countered.

“Well, even so, it was a pretty good way to finish the series.”

“Uh, okay, you just keep on being wrong, if that’s what you want.”

“Oh, now, that’s just cruel.”

“Guys!” Akane shouted at them from the kitchen, then flicked on the lights.

“What?” they both said from across the apartment, blinking and each holding their gifts.

Akane sighed, gripping onto the edge of the counter with one hand.

“You’re probably gonna need to take me to the hospital now,” she said.

Then pulled out her taser and, wincing, pressed it to her collarbone.

ZAP!

“Oh, um, what a lovely pair of… socks,” Akane said, holding up the pair with the price tag of $5.99 clipping them together.

“But did you see the rabbits?” Junpei said, pointing at them.

“Those are supposed to be rabbits?” Akane asked, squinting to get a better look at them, and Junpei smacked his forehead.

The music started to skip.

“See? What did I tell you? Screw this holiday!” he ranted. “This stupid godda —”

ZAP!

“I can’t believe you actually posed for all twelve months!” Junpei said, laughing as he flipped up all the pages of the calendar. Through the dim lighting, Akane could see Carlos actually blushing as Junpei paused and held up the calendar to the month of June, admiring the large photo of Carlos lying on what was probably a green screen beach, naked except for a pair of firefighter pants, an axe buried in a bucket and the muscles of his chest gleaming with oil.

“Oh, yeah,” Junpei said, biting his lip, “This one’s gonna be up for a few months.”

“And I’ll need to borrow this,” Akane said quickly. “For, um, research purposes! At Crash Keys.”

“Someone just got wet down there,” Junpei murmured to Carlos, and they both embraced as they exchanged one long, sensual kiss.

“Okay, Carlos, here’s yours!” Akane sang as she practically shoved Carlos’s present at him.

He opened the box and his brow immediately furrowed.

“Well?” Junpei asked, and Akane’s right hand strayed behind her back, to the pouch under her bow that had the taser in it.

“It’s, uh…” Carlos fished around in the box and brought up his hand, dangling a pair of fuzzy handcuffs from his index finger. “Is this one of those inside jokes between you two that I still don’t get?”

“You know,” Junpei said, “For someone who just posed practically naked for what could be legitimate commercial merchandise, you are way too vanilla.”

“Vanilla?” Carlos asked. “What do you mean, ‘vanilla?’ I’m —”

But Akane didn’t hear the rest.

ZAP!

Akane stared down at the book in her hands.

Then she glanced up at Carlos, who had an eager, hopeful look on his face.

She looked back down at the book, especially at its large printed title:

The Huge Book of Hard Sudoku.

“What? What’s wrong with it?” Carlos asked, scratching the side of his head. “Junpei said you’d love it!”

“I was kidding,” Junpei protested. “Akane, I swear I was.”

The music started to skip, and Akane began fumbling around for her pouch.

ZAP!

“Aww,” Carlos said, running his hand over the embroidered cat picture on his new throw pillow.

“That is pretty cute, Akane.” Junpei nodded with approval. “But it’s not as good as my present,” he added.

She laughed, hugging her Kanny bunny plush that he had made for her himself.

Carlos slumped his shoulders, still tracing the outline of the cat on the pillow.

“What’s the matter?” Junpei asked.

Carlos heaved a long, shuddering sigh. “It’s just that – well, this looks a lot like the cat I had a long time ago. The cat that… died in the fire. With my parents.” A tear trickled down his cheek, and he hugged the small pillow to his chest.

“… Oh,” was all Junpei could say.

“Argh!” Akane shouted, and both Carlos and Junpei whipped their heads around to face her, startled. “You know, I’m really starting to agree with you about Christmas, Junpei.”

“What are you – hey, wait a minute!”

“Akane, don’t you dare –”

ZAP!

 

“Hah HAH!” Junpei shouted in exultation as he held the framed picture high in the air. “I knew it! Oh, man, it was all leading up to this, and it was pretty much torture, but it was worth it. I’ve been dreaming of this moment.”

“What is it?” Carlos asked, trying to peer at Junpei’s present. “It’s a…”

“Only the best thing a guy could ever ask for!” Junpei cried, tears of joy shining in his eyes. “O-other than you two, I mean. A copper-plated funyarinpa!”

Carlos shook his head after a moment of perusing the image, handing it back to Junpei. “Sorry, babe. I don’t get it.”

“You know what? Right now, I don’t even care that you don’t know what it is, or that ‘babe’ is the one thing you refuse to stop calling me. Akane, this really is the best Christmas.” Junpei pulled her in close for a tight hug.

“Oof!” She gasped as the wind was momentarily knocked out of her, but she laughed after a moment, patting Junpei’s back. “Well, I’m glad you feel that way!” At the back of her mind, though, she was already steeling herself for one of their gifts to fall flat.

“Akane, I guess – uh, here’s yours,” Carlos said, handing her a rather large, heavy present. She stretched out her arms from behind Junpei and he started swaying on the spot as she struggled to rip off the wrapping paper.

“Woah, Junpei, slow down! Let me open this,” she said, unable to keep from giggling, and he lifted her up for a second, spun her around, then set her back down as she righted her sense of direction and looked down at her gift.

“It’s a…” she breathed, opening the cover.

“A scrapbook!” Carlos finished, sounding just as excited as she flipped through the pages. “From all the good times we’ve shared together over the past year.”

It was very meticulously crafted. There was a seashell glued on the page from their trip to the beach, and a picture Maria had taken of the three of them running hand in hand into the water. There were three separate photos of them in the Tunnel of Love from their trip to the summer festival in town, and a hilarious still image of them clutching onto each other during their haunted house tour, Akane nearly riding piggyback on Junpei as he clutched onto Carlos’s arm. There was a separate page of all the pictures Carlos had bought of them on the log ride, and, Akane blushed as she turned the page, there were several snapshots Carlos must have printed off his phone the morning after their first time all together. There were nine pages dedicated to their joint proposal in Tokyo, and another nine from the engagement party which Aoi and Maria had thrown for them when they returned home. There was a glossy picture of Akane blushing on the couch between Carlos and Junpei as they hugged her from either side. There was another of Akane and Carlos each kissing Junpei’s cheeks.

“Wow,” Carlos said, “This turned out better than I thought!”

“It’s gorgeous!” Akane whispered.

“It’s yours, but really, I figure it’s for all of us,” Carlos said. “You two are the best boyfriend and girlfriend a guy could ever ask for.”

“Oh,” Akane sobbed, closing the book and hugging it to her chest, “Carlos!”

“Yeah, you really outdid yourself with this one,” Junpei added, shaking his head in awe.

“And what about you, Junpei?” Akane asked, hoping beyond hope that she had finally done it, that she had finally found the perfect timeline where they all gave and received amazing gifts.

Junpei picked up a small box and handed it to Carlos. He carefully unwrapped it and unveiled a small, black box that, had they all not already been engaged, Akane would have assumed bore a ring.

She held her breath, and Carlos pulled out a small, sleek-looking oval device.

“Um,” Carlos said, chuckling, “Well, I have always wanted a paperweight.”

“Oh, uh, here.” Junpei stepped toward Carlos, pressing down on Carlos’s thumb on a button sticking out of the device.

A bunch of digital numbers appeared on the screen, and Junpei read them out as he hovered Carlos’s thumb over each of them.

“Here’s the weather… and here are our exact coordinates. Here’s the time, and wow, check this out, there’s a pedometer down in the lower let corner! And over here are… Uh…”

“CO2 levels,” Carlos supplied, “How did you get something like this? I haven’t seen anything like it.”

“Oh, uh,” Junpei said, grinning sheepishly, “I must’ve – Sigma helped me out. There’s probably other things on there too, but we’ll ask him how to find the rest of it.”

“Oh…” Carlos said, starting to cry, but this time Akane didn’t feel miserable seeing his tears. “Junpei, this is…”

“So, I didn’t screw up on this one, did I?” Junpei asked with a wince, and Carlos embraced him full-on.

Akane let out a long, heavy sigh of relief. Her shoulders relaxed, her heart was still beating fast but it wasn’t out of anxiety anymore.

She had done it. She’d found the perfect timeline.

Now they could go to bed and –

ZAP!

“Oh, fucking hell.”

Akane’s eyes snapped open, but she didn’t lift her head suddenly. She’d made that mistake before.

Instead, she just lied on the ground, on her side, and stared at the similarly sprawled out figures before her.

“Junpei?” she called out, wondering why they too were lying down, why the lights were on, and why the music wasn’t playing. “Carlos?”

Carlos groaned, and he was the first of them to sit up. Akane watched him rub the back of his head, his eyes closed as he winced in pain, but when he opened them and looked around, his expression quickly turned into worry.

“Hey? Are you two all right?”

“Nope,” Junpei said, and Akane finally, slowly, began to lift herself up too, in a side-sitting position. Her muscles ached and her head was pounding, moreso than usual whenever she SHIFTed. She focused her gaze on Junpei: he remained lying on the polished floor, on his back and staring up at the ceiling.

“You do realize what just happened, don’t you?” he asked, flicking his eyes over to Akane as she and Carlos both helped each other stand up.

“What are you – oh,” Carlos said.

“We SHIFTed,” Akane said simply, and together, she and Carlos reached out their hands toward Junpei, but he crossed his arms over his chest.

“No, we didn’t SHIFT. Our other selves did, from this universe. Don’t you get it? We were in the perfect timeline. I’d finally…”

“You’d finally what?” Akane asked and Carlos turned around in a half-circle.

“Oh, good,” he said, sighing with relief. “Everyone’s all there.”

“Junpei, come on! What did you finally do?”

He closed his eyes. “I found it. The timeline where we all got each other the best presents.”

“You mean to say that you —”

“— Oh, don’t try to pretend you didn’t do it either.” He blinked his eyes back open and frowned up at her. “I got the idea from you, after all. When you tased yourself in one timeline, I think it’s after I gave Carlos a cat pillow, I decided to follow you.” He shrugged, then idly brushed down the front of his dress shirt. “Then I kept ending up in all these timelines where two of us didn’t like our presents, and then I started looking for the one where we all got good presents.”

Akane stared down at him, and Carlos nudged her.

“I… kinda did the same thing,” he said, ducking his head in embarrassment. “And I ended up in a couple of timelines where it was even worse. Sean’s painting of us was missing, or some of us were missing from it. And you two would be like, ‘Don’t you remember? So-and-so died months ago.’ It was awful.” He shuddered, and Akane put her hand on his arm.

“So I wonder what was so bad about this history to make us all want to SHIFT out of it?” Junpei muttered, and Akane glanced down at the coffee table, then at the floor.

“I think I know,” she said, then bent down toward Junpei, “but before I tell you, please Junpei, take my hand.”

“And mine,” Carlos added, reaching out toward Junpei. He sighed, then, grumbling, lifted of his hands to grab onto theirs.

They all groaned as they lifted him up onto his feet. He dusted his shirt again, then resumed crossing his arms as he glowered at the tree, almost as if in betrayal. “So, what’s so terrible about this universe? Why did the other versions of us SHIFT out of here?”

After a moment’s thought and another cursory sweep across the apartment, Akane pronounced, “I don’t think anything major happened. In fact, I think everything leading up to this night happened just like the first timelines we each experienced. But look around!”

“Oh,” Carlos said, his gaze sweeping all around the apartment too. “I think I get it.”

“That’s right,” Akane confirmed, nodding. “I don’t think we got each other any present.”

Junpei smacked his forehead with his palm and Carlos looked down at his feet.

“That’s why we kicked ourselves out of the best timeline,” Akane continued. “We all must’ve forgotten to get each other presents!”

“And SHIFTed to the timeline where we all ended up getting each other the best ones,” Carlos finished. “That was my goal. I kept SHIFTing because I wanted the perfect timeline for the both of you. The problems was, I kept ending up in horrible universes, especially ones where you both weren’t happy. I couldn’t stay in those. I love you guys too much to see you miserable like that.”

“Oh!” Akane put her hand over her heart, her voice wavering. “Carlos!”

“Uh, yeah,” Junpei murmured, “I couldn’t stand seeing you two so disappointed when you saw your presents, but obviously trying to hide it.”

“Hmm,” Akane said, lifting her hand up to cup her chin in thought, “y’know, this reminds me a lot of the classic Christmas story.”

“It’s a Wonderful Life?” Carlos asked, raising his head to look at her, his expression a bit less glum.

“Home Alone?” Junpei asked, looking confused.

“No! It’s about a couple who both want to get each other the perfect gift. The husband has a watch, and the wife has beautiful hair. So, the husband sells his gold watch to get his wife combs, but when he gets home…”

“He finds out his wife cut her hair, to get him something for his watch,” Carlos finished, a smile slowly spreading across his face. “Yeah, I’ve heard of it.”

“Well, that sucks,” Junpei said. “Kind of a letdown, if you ask me.”

Akane lifted her hand to pinch Junpei’s cheek quickly. “But if you think about it, it’s actually got a nice message. They loved each other so much that they would give up their most treasured possessions to make the other person happy. And it ties back to the Biblical tale of three kings who traveled far and wide to bring gifts to a baby who had been born on Christmas day. I think one of the ending lines of the story is, ‘Of all who give and receive gifts, such as they are wisest.’”

Junpei rolled his eyes and said, “I dunno, Akane. I mean, look at where we ended up. We didn’t get each other any gifts in this universe! No, instead we got sucker-punched here, after all of us tried hard to make each other happy. I guess none of us are wise.”

“Well, I think we’ve learned not to mess around with SHIFTing for something like this,” Carlos pointed out. “I mean, before today, none of us have tried to SHIFT since we got out of the dessert, right? And none of us had been switched out into some life-threatening situation in another universe in the past twelve months. So maybe all the SHIFTing we did do this time made it easier for our other selves from this history to trade places with us.”

“Hmm,” Akane said, “I’d have to think about that a bit more, but yes, I think that’s a good theory! And what’s even better, I still remember the timeline where you got me information on a lead to the terrorist.”

“You what?” Junpei asked, whipping his head to face Akane, his eyes as wide as saucers

“That’s right! So it wasn’t all a waste,” Akane said, beaming. “And what’s more,” she held up her right hand, displaying her engagement ring, “We all must still be together in this universe!”

“Hey, you’re right!” Carlos said, looking down at his own right hand.

Junpei scoffed at that, but Carlos slyly lifted Junpei’s hand as well, and his engagement ring sparkled as brightly as Carlos’s.

“You put it back on tonight! Trust me, this is a much better outcome than some of the timelines I’ve seen.”

Junpei gazed up into Carlos’s eyes, and Akane looked on, tears threatening to spill out over onto her cheeks as she saw Junpei’s morose expression finally soften.

“Exactly!” she said, wiping the corners of her eyes with her sleeve as her fiances kissed lovingly. “So you two know what this means, right?”

“Hell yeah, I do!” Junpei said, quickly turning to bend down and snatch up her taser, which she had left on the floor. “Let’s switch back with those assholes!”

“Ugh, no!” Akane said, stilling Junpei with her hand on his arm. “That’s the complete opposite of what I meant!”

“She’s right, you know,” Carlos said, grinning over at her. “We may not have ended up in the most ideal universe, but we can look at the bright side of things! We’re not going to die. We’re together. Maybe Christmas isn’t about what you get for your loved ones, but rather, who you’re lucky enough to be with. “

“Y-yeah, I guess you’re right,” Junpei said, rubbing the back of his head sheepishly. “Being with both of you is what’s important.”

“And I’m giving this back to Diana,” Akane said, gently taking the taser away from Junpei and squeezing his hand. After a moment, he squeezed hers back.

“C’mon, gather round!” Carlos said, taking out his phone from his back pocket. “Let’s send everyone a holiday photo, from all of us.”

Akane and Junpei nodded and they moved around so Akane stood in the middle, angling Carlos’s phone to get all three of them in the shot, with the painting behind them.

“Okay everyone!” Carlos said when they were all comfortably posed, their arms around each other and pressing their heads together. “Say, ‘Have a very SHIFTy Christmas!’”

“Wait, isn’t that what we just said not to do?” Junpei said just as Carlos was about to take their picture.

“Oh, yeah,” he said. “Whoops.”

Akane laughed, kissing Junpei on the cheek, then Carlos. “How about instead, we say, ‘Have a very Jumpy Christmas?’” she suggested.

“Much better,” Carlos said, and even Junpei grinned as Akane took their picture.